I didn't answer his question. I just couldn't.
We feel silent as I sit there uncomfortably. Gusto kong hawakan ang kamay ng orasan para maging mabilis ito. Gusto kong agawin sa employee ang manibela ng golf cart para ako na lang ang mag-drive.
I don't want to be near him. I can't stand his presence. It's because my heart instantly double it's pace whenever he's around. I feel like my inside was churning, my stomach feels like it has a shallow.
Gusto ko na lang na pumuntang villa at magmukmok sa kwarto. Kumain ng ice cream o 'di kaya chocolates.
My lips parted. Magsasalita na sana ako kahit hindi ko alam ang sasabihin nang maunahan niya ako.
"Never mind," he icily said. The coldness in his voice is dripping like acid.
Naitikom ko na lang ang bibig ko nang huminto ang golf cart sa harap ng villa. Wala akong nagawa kundi ang bumaba doon.
Ilang metro lang ang layo ng villa niya sa akin kaya nakita ko rin siyang bumaba doon at pumasok sa sarili niyang villa.
Mabagal ang mga yapak ko papunta sa sariling villa. Mabigat ang nararamdaman. Bagsak ang balikat at nakasimangot ang mukha.
Nakatulala ako habang nakatitig sa kawalan, malalim ang iniisip. I was sitting under the sun lounger near the pool on my villa. On ny right hand was an ice tea.
I stirr the silver metal straw on it and then sip a little amount of iced tea. Ang malamig na iced tea ay agad na bumalot sa aking lalamunan. I was also wearing my purple aviators to protect my eyes against the hot sunlight.
My feelings right now was heavy. I feel like a little part of my heart was now enveloped with a little bit of darkness. My brain was haywired.
Ibinaba ko ang hawak na baso at prenteng umupo. I shut my eyes close as I feel the warm brisk of wind touching my skin. Sa antok na nararamdaman ay pumasok ako sa loob at humiga sa kama.
I set my alarm first to remind me that I still have a meeting later. Sa paglapat pa lang ng malambot na kama sa balat ko, antok at pagod agad ang bumalot sa sistema ko. Nang ipikit ang bumibigat na talukap ay agad akong nakatulog.
Nagising ako bago pa tumunog ang nakakarinding alarm clock.
"May usapan tayong pumuntang bar, ha? 'Wag mong kalimutan."
I mentally rolled my eyes at what Clea said on the phone. "Paulit-ulit? Unli?" I snorted. "Mauna na kayo, I still have a meeting."
Pagkatapos kong sabihin iyon ay nagpaalam at mag-aayos pa raw siya. While I am here, fixing myself to get ready, hindi pa pala sila nakaayos.
Pero sabagay, may meeting pa naman ako.
For the nth time, I fixed my midnight blue satin dress that hugged my body so tight. It revealed my sexy and small waist. Pinabayaan kong nakalugay ang mahabang buhok. My wavy hair was now flowing freely against my back, dancing with the cold wind.
Lumapat ang pang-gabing hangin sa mapusyaw kong balat. Agad akong sinalubong ng employee ng resort para ihatid sa convention center.
It was just a short meeting. Thirty minutes meeting, probably. Pagkatapos magpakilala ay may kaunting salo-salo para sa kanila. For their hardships and sacrifices.
I couldn't be with them because Clea is already bombarding me with a hundred of messages. Hindi ko na namalayan ang oras. I was having fun with them! Kaya noong nakakuha ng magandang timing ay agad akong nagpaalam sa kanila.
I went to the restroom first to retouch my make-up. Nagulo ng kaunti ang buhok ko kaya inayos ko muna ito. Some lipstick we're now gone so I put some on my plump lips.
I make my way on the entrance of the bar with overflowing confident. Head up, with a fresh and smiling face, I walk there like I was on a fashion show.
The crowded place, wild people, dancing and the colorful neon light greeted me. What caught my attention was the hot guy who is probably the DJ today! But probably, not my type.
He was like a playboy or something. Auto reject agad pag ganyan. He was wearing that smirk of his that can melt the hearts of girls. Nakakaakit, nakakahipnotismo. Pero hindi tumalab sa akin. He is handsome, yes. But I'm not attracted.
Clea said they were on the VIP lounge. Sa tulong ng isang guard, sinabi niya kung nasaan sila kaya agad akong nakarating doon.
I saw Clea on her usual self. Magulo na ngayon ang buhok, making her look like a hot girl always visiting a club. At sa tingin ko rin, nakainom na siya.
Zach's arm is now wrapped around Clea's small waist. His hair was also disheveled. Ang tatlong butones ng polo ay naka-unbuttoned na.
I rolled my eyes. Hindi ko na sila binalingan at sinalampak ang sarili paupo sa sofa.
"Ang aga mo naman. Sana mamaya ka na lang pumunta." sarcastic is very evident on her voice.
I acted like I was surprised to teased her more. "Oh? Hindi mo naman agad sinabi. Dapat pala natulog na lang muna ako."
With that, she nearly kick me. Kung hindi ko nailag ang mga paa ko, paniguradong malalaglag ako sa upuan. I smirked inwardly.
Ang pikon naman.
I let my self be free that night without knowing the consequences after. Ang alam ko lang, last na 'to. I will, again, drown myself with work after this. And I will focus myself in my modeling career too. My family or fans is now slowly rising.
"Babe? Can I kiss you? Give me some kiss, please..."
I rolled my eyes when I heard Clea's drunk voice. She's now drunk. And maybe, I am too.
"Let's go home now, you two are both drunk." he coldly said. "Nakalimang shots pa lang kayo, tumba agad."
Naipikit ko ng mariin ang nga mata. Everything was so blurry. My head is now spinning. Umaalon na ang paningin ko at kung tumayo pa ako ngayon ay matutumba rin naman.
I feel like my stomach is now a hurricane. I wanted to vomit.
Naramdaman ko na lang ang sarili na naglalakad. Nakapakit ako para pakalmahin ang sarili at mahimasmasan. I didn't know what's happening on my surrounding.
Unti-unti ng huminga ang wild music galing sa bar. The evening wind was now cold. Dumadampi ito sa balat ko at sa manipis kong damit. Naramdaman ko na lang na dahan-dahan akong pinaupo sa golf cart kapagkuwan ay umandar na ito.
Unti-unti akong nahimasmasan at kumalma. Nang iminulat ang mga mata ay ganoon pa rin pero alam na ang nangyayari sa paligid.
Naunang bumaba ang dalawa dahil mas maunang madadaanan ang villa nila kaysa sa akin. Zach insisted to just escort me to my villa but I declined him.
"I can handle my self. Clea needs you right now."
Wala na siyang nagawa nang paandarin na ang golf cart. Again, I closed my eyes and rest ny head on the back rest.
"Villa number sixteen. That's my room." I said without thinking. Hindi ko na alam ang sinasabi ko.
"Did I just said number sixteen? Is it my room number? What's my room number again? Did I forget it?" I murmured slowly that I know I can only hear it myself.
As I opened the door of the villa, I immediately feel the peacefulness of home. That feeling when I wanted to go home from work, I felt that here.
Hinihila na ako ng antok pero nang may nakitang bulto ng isang lalake hindi kalayuan sa banyo ay napakurap ako. Pupungas pa ang mata dahil sa kalasingan.
May towel na nakasukbit sa balikat niya. His hair is damp. He is also topless! I swear, I felt like I was looking at a perfect sculpture. I was drooling over his mascyline body, his eight packs abs was so good in the eyes. His biceps is on the right places. And oh my gosh! The v-line is also perfect!
I don't know anymore if this is a dream or what. I just know that this man is really sexy!
The familiar built of the man come closer to me. As I met his dark hazel brown eyes, my heart started to race. Para akong nakalutang sa ere habang nakatitig sa malalim niyang mga mata.
His thick black brows are furrowed as if he's confused why I am suddenly here. I am too. Why is he here? Paano kaya siya nakapasok? And the biggest question to me is, is this a dream? It felt like it was true.
His face, his perfect body, his eight pack abs, I felt like all of that is really true.
"What are you doing here?" we said in chorus.
I chuckled lazily. Dahil siguro sa kalasingan ay nagkaroon ako ng lakas ng loob na lumapit sa kaniya. Sa sobrang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko, parang hindi ko na iyon maramdaman. Hindi ko alam na ang malakas ng tibok ng puso ko ay masakit rin pala. Masakit pala sa dibdib.
I saw his lips parted as he watched my every step. I stopped infront of him with a sly grin on my face. Napalunok siya. I saw his adam apple move. I slowly licked my lips.
I pinched his cheek if he was really real. If he was not just on my dream. And when I felt his skin on my finger, I was slightly shocked.
"Are you really real? Or you are just on my dream? Hmm..." I whispered on a hoarse voice.
Mas lalo pa akong lumapit sa kaniya. I felt his heavy breathing now that I am so close to him.
"What the heck..." he said in a raspy voice that sent shivers down my spine.
"Can I slap you?"
Nakita kong namilog ng kaunti ang mata niya pero hindi ko na iyon pinansin. Agad ko siyang sinampal kung totoo ba talaga siya. I just wanted to test it.
Sa pagdampi ng kanang palad ko sa kaniyang mukha ay agaran ang pagbaling niya sa gilid. Namula ang pisngi niya.
Kung kanina ay siya ang nagulat, ako naman ngayon. Tiningnan niya ako ng masama pero bahagya pa ring gulat dahil sa nangyari. Namilog ang mga mata ko at lumipad ang kamay sa bibig.
"Oh gosh! Are you really real?!"

He gave me a puzzled look. "Ano sa tingin mo? Clone? Multo?" he echoed sarcastically.
I shifted on my weight. We ere so close to each other but I didn't give a damn on that. I cleared my throat.
"If you really is real, I'm going to say this to you now..." I trailed off. "I hate you very much. You're so arrogant, do you even know that? You are sarcastic sometimes, causing me to hate you more! At...palagi na lang seryoso ang mukha mo! Hindi ka ba marunong ngumiti? Can't you smile? At ito pa! Feeling mo ikaw na ang pinakagwapong lalake! But you know what? You're not!"
He laughed unbelievably. "Whoa. Are we gonna argue on that matter? Pati ang hindi pagngiti, napansin mo?"
"Yes! And you know what?" I arched my brow.
"What?" namamaos ang boses niya.
"I had a crush on you before! But when I knew about your personality, na you are suplado pala, from one hundred percent crush, it went instantly to zero!"
I glared at him when he stepped closer to me. Ang kaniyang kamay ay nasa bewang ko na.
"Tapos ka na bang magsalita?" he whispered near my ear. It sent chills on my body.
Para akong mabubuwal sa kinatatayuan nang inilapit niya ang mukha sa akin. His nose is now touching mine. My heart started to leap again that I think my ribcage would break. He licked his lips while looking at mine.
I feel like my stomach was now churning. Parang hinahalukay ito. He was now going to kiss me on the lips but then...
I puked. On his chest.
Napaatras agad siya sa akin habang ako naman nakapikit na. Ang sakit rin ng ulo ko at gusto ko na lang na matulog.
"Fuck, Autumn..."