"Mukha kang namatayan. Umayos ka nga, nasa public place tayo."
Inangat ko ang tingin ko mula sa iced coffee na kanina ko pa tinutunaw gamit ang isip ko. Sa harap ko, nakaupo si Jasper—or "Jap" para sa mga unfortunate souls na close sa kanya. As usual, he was radiating chaotic energy. Nakasuot siya ng neon green na hoodie kahit tirik na tirik ang araw sa labas, at busy siya sa pag-swipe sa phone niya na parang 'yun ang magliligtas sa ekonomiya ng Pilipinas.
"Hindi ako namatayan," sagot ko, sabay higop sa kape na lasang tubig na lang. "Nagmumuni-muni lang. It's called introspection, Jap. Try mo minsan."
Tumawa siya nang malakas. 'Yung tawang umaagaw ng atensyon ng kabilang table. "Introspection ka dyan. Mukha kang nag-cocompute kung kasya pa ba ang sweldo mo hanggang katapusan. Which reminds me, bayaran mo ko sa Grab kanina ha."
"Oo na, send mo GCash QR mo," irap ko.
Nasa isang aesthetic café kami sa BGC. You know the type—minimalist interiors, overpriced pastries, at puro mga tao na naka-MacBook na akala mo CEO ng start-up company pero nag-eedit lang naman ng Canva templates. Kasama na ako doon sa mga naka-laptop. I was trying to finish a logo design for a client who wanted something "pop but distinct but minimal but loud." Labo, diba?
"Uy, tignan mo 'to, Ethan," biglang sabi ni Jap, turning his phone screen towards me. "Match kami! 5 kilometers away lang. Mahilig daw sa dogs at travels. Perfect match!"
Tinignan ko lang saglit 'yung picture. Maganda naman. Mukhang mabait. Pero naramdaman ko agad 'yung reflex ko na maghanap ng mali.
"Mahilig sa travel?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. "Sure ka bang kaya mong sabayan lifestyle niyan? Baka mamaya, next date niyo sa Bali na, tapos ikaw hanggang Balintawak lang ang budget."
Binawi ni Jap 'yung phone niya at sumimangot. "Napaka-nega mo talaga. Kaya ka single eh."
"I am single by choice, Jap. Huge difference," depensa ko. "At saka, tignan mo 'yung bio niya. 'Looking for someone who can handle my mood swings.' Red flag 'yan, pre. Ibig sabihin niyan, gagawin kang emotional punching bag."
Umiling-iling si Jap, parang disappointed na tatay. "Grabe. Ang lala ng trust issues mo, bro. Dalawang taon na simula nung kay Adrian. Move on na tayo, please? Ang daming isda sa dagat."
"Ayoko sa isda," mabilis kong sagot. "Malansa."
"Tanga, metaphor 'yon!" Jap groaned, throwing a crumpled tissue at me. "Ang sinasabi ko lang, sayang 'yang mukha mo. Gwapo ka naman sana, matangkad, may trabaho... kaso 'yung puso mo parang bato na tinubuan ng lumot."
Natawa ako nang mahina. "Better a mossy rock than a broken glass, Jap. At least 'yung bato, matibay. Hindi basta-basta nadudurog."
Ibinalik ko ang atensyon ko sa laptop ko. I tried to focus on the vector lines I was manipulating, but Jap’s words lingered like a bad aftertaste. Dalawang taon. Two years since I decided that love wasn't worth the hassle.
And honestly? My life was great.
Walang nagdedemand ng oras ko. Walang nagagalit kapag nakatulog ako nang hindi nagre-reply. Walang selosan, walang drama, walang "we need to talk." I had complete control over my emotions. My routine was sacred: Wake up, coffee, work, Netflix, sleep. Repeat. Safe. Predictable.
Bakit ko gugustuhing guluhin 'yon?
"Huy," siko sa akin ni Jap. "Speaking of rocks... kilala mo ba 'yon?"
Napatingin ako sa tinuturo niya gamit ang nguso niya (kasi Pinoy siya, syempre).
Sa may counter, may isang lalaking nakatayo. Tall, broad shoulders, wearing a fitted crisp white shirt tucked into navy slacks. He looked like he stepped out of a catalog for young professionals who drink expensive whiskey.
Nanlamig ang buong katawan ko. Parang biglang nag-drop ang temperature ng aircon ng café to negative zero.
It was Adrian.
And he wasn't alone. May kasama siyang babae—maganda, sopistikada, nakahawak sa braso niya habang tumatawa sa kung anumang sinabi ni Adrian.
"Holy sh*t," bulong ni Jap. "Si Adrian ba 'yan? At... sino 'yang kasama niya? Bago?"
Hindi ako makagalaw. It felt like the universe was playing a sick prank on me. Of all the coffee shops in BGC, of all the days, of all the goddamn hours—ngayon pa?
Nakita ko si Adrian na lumingon sa direksyon namin. Maybe he felt eyes on him. Or maybe destiny just wanted to twist the knife a little deeper.
Our eyes met.
For a second, time froze. Naalala ko lahat. The way he used to look at me like I was the only person in the room. The way we used to promise forever over cheap beer and street food. The way he broke my heart efficiently, coldly, clinically.
Tapos, ngumiti siya. Not a regretful smile. Not a sad smile. Just a polite, acknowledging nod. Like I was an old acquaintance he barely remembered.
Something inside me snapped. Not pain—panic. I needed to leave. Now.
"Jap, tara na," sabi ko, mabilis na nililigpit ang laptop ko. Halos mahulog ko pa ang mouse ko sa pagmamadali.
"Ha? Te-teka, 'di ko pa ubos kape ko—"
"I don't care, iinumin mo 'yan sa labas o iiwan kita dito," banta ko, standing up abruptly.
"Oo na, oo na! Chill ka lang!" Jap stood up too, grabbing his cup.
Nagmamadali akong lumabas ng café, head down, praying to all the saints na hindi ako lapitan ni Adrian. I felt like a fugitive escaping a crime scene. Pumasok ako sa glass door palabas, pushing it hard—
BLAG.
"Aray!"
I stopped.
Sa pagmamadali ko, hindi ko napansin na may papasok pala. The door swung out and hit someone straight in the shoulder. Hard.
Natapon ang hawak niyang stack ng mga papel. Nagkalat ang mga bond paper sa semento ng BGC sidewalk.
"Shit," I cursed under my breath. Great. Just great. Now I’m the villain in someone else’s day.
"Sorry, Miss! Sorry, hindi ako tumitingin," sabi ko agad, lumuhod para tulungan siyang pulutin ang mga papel. My heart was still racing from seeing Adrian, kaya nanginginig pa ang mga kamay ko.
"Okay lang, okay lang," a calm voice replied. Walang halong inis. Walang sigaw.
Inabot ko ang isang papel sketch ito. Charcoal sketch ng isang mata. Ang ganda. Detalyado.
Inangat ko ang tingin ko para ibigay sa kanya.
Wait.
She was... calm. Sobrang calm. Nakaluhod din siya, pinupulot ang mga gamit niya, pero parang wala lang sa kanya na binunggo ko siya at pinakalat ang buhay niya sa kalsada. She had messy bun hair, oversized round glasses na medyo tabingi na ngayon, at suot niya ay simpleng oversized t-shirt na may print ng pusa na nagsasabing "Not Today."
Tumingin siya sa akin. Her eyes were dark brown, steady, and strangely amuse.
"Kuya," she said, deadpan. "Hawak mo 'yung resume ko. Unless balak mo akong i-hire, pwede paki-abot?"
Natulala ako saglit. Usually, kapag nakakabangga ako, nagagalit sila. O kaya nagpapanic. Pero siya? Parang nanonood lang siya ng boring na pelikula.
"Ah, eh... sorry," I stammered, handing the paper back. "Nagmamadali kasi ako. May... may emergency."
Tinanggap niya 'yung papel at tumayo. She dusted off her jeans casually. "Emergency? Mukha ngang emergency. Namumutla ka eh. Para kang nakakita ng multo."
I scoffed nervously, standing up too. "Something like that."
Adrian was a ghost, after all. The ghost of my past stupidities.
Lumabas na rin si Jap, hingal na hingal. "Huy, Ethan! Bakit ka ba tumatakbo—Hala, Miss, sorry! Siya may kasalanan, hindi ako. Demonyo 'yan mag-drive ng sarili niyang paa."
The girl looked at Jap, then back at me. A small smile played on her lips. Not a flirting smile. Just... entertained.
"Ingat sa susunod," she said simply. "Sayang ang outfit kung sa ospital ang bagsak."
Tapos, tinalikuran na niya kami at pumasok sa café na kinalabasan namin—the same café where Adrian was.
Sinundan ko siya ng tingin. There was something about her energy. It was grounded. Unbothered. Parang siya ang human version ng "Do Not Disturb" mode.
"Sino 'yon?" tanong ni Jap, sinisiko ako. "Chicks pre, ah. Kaso mukhang masungit."
"Hindi masungit," bulong ko, still looking at the door closing behind her. "Kalmado lang."
"Sus, type mo 'no?" pang-aasar ni Jap.
"Tumigil ka nga," I snapped, turning away and walking fast towards the parking lot. "I don't have time for this. Umuwi na tayo."
Sumunod si Jap, daldal nang daldal, pero lumilipad ang isip ko.
First, Adrian reappears like a bad omen. Second, I literally crash into a strange girl who reacts to physical pain with sarcasm.
Nag-vibrate ang phone ko sa bulsa.
I pulled it out casually whilst walking. It was a notification from Facebook.
"People You May Know: Mika Villanueva."
Wait. Paano? I checked the profile photo. It was the girl. The girl with the messy bun and glasses. How did the algorithm know? Did our phones touch when we collided? Or sadyang stalker lang talaga si Mark Zuckerberg?
And why did I feel a tiny, microscopic spark of curiosity?
No. No, Ethan. Stop it.
Pinatay ko ang screen ng phone ko at binalibag ito sa passenger seat ng kotse ko pagpasok namin.
"Never again," I whispered to myself as I started the engine.
"Ha? Anong never again?" tanong ni Jap habang nagkakabit ng seatbelt. "Never again sa kape doon? Oo nga, mahal eh."
"Wala," sabi ko, driving away from the ghosts and the accidents. "Never again sa katangahan."
Pero habang nagmamaneho ako palayo, hindi ko maalis sa isip ko 'yung charcoal sketch ng mata na hawak niya. It looked sad.
And for
some annoying reason, I wanted to know why.