Morning and breakfast are about to start. Anna immediately woke me up in the middle of 6 o'clock by the Imperial Time of the calendar. Spring is about to come and it has almost been two weeks since I became Seira and live a life so peaceful.
I haven't done anything but exercise my body to its full capacity. The only problem is, I haven't seen father over the time I spent here wondering, how come he's always been very busy and he wakes up so early and gets home so late.
I wonder what his job is...
"Milady, the marquis will be joining you for today's breakfast, " Anna said while putting on some head accessory in my head like a doll. She's been doing that since then, I didn't complain cause I'm well aware of social trends after all.
Iris is one of those who had to force herself to fit on the court.
"Father? " She nodded happily, after that, she clipped my hair with a pin.
"Done! " She proudly said. She really does like Seira this much, she's so loyal, I wonder, will there be a time that she'll backstab her? I see quite a few from my previous life, maids that cause the poisoning of their master.
People use maids for their own gain and plant spies for their own benefits, after that the maid's fate will be blurry cause most of them die after their tasks. That's the ideal fact I've been seeing in my world, the court is not a place for weak nor stupid, it is a place where only those smart can survive.
So if you let your guard off, you'll die by poison or assassination. That is the truth and it will never be a lie. Such fate can only turn into their demise, that's why Iris had to cling to her innocence to survive, hopefully, she'll stop being ignorant and start acting wisely.
"Anna, what does my father do? Why is he leaving so early and only coming home when everyone is asleep? " I asked Anna, then before she responded, she put down the comb on the table.
"The marquis is a busy man, he manages the military divisions as the head knight of the empire, he is well known as the master of soldiers and a mentor to the knighthood, " she responded putting her fingers up as she thought about something so I nodded quietly.
Head Knight? A loyal servant under the current emperor, like a dog, always following orders. The job of a head knight is to govern the military affairs, starting from the budgets and the well-being of the soldiers of the empire. He had held up the 1st division in his privilege and he also taught his underlings anything they needed to learn from the Head Knight.
He also fights in the front line as the main commander, which means he is the one that commands the army and he is a man who thinks that discipline is important. I've heard of them from my former life, a Head Knight is the same as a Head Commander of the military. My title is the same, I was the head commander so I command the soldiers whether they belong to my division or to the other divisions.
So he is at least that good?
"Let's go milady, the marquis awaits your arrival, " Anna reminded me, and I almost forgot about today's event. I have been dazed so much these days, maybe because I think about anything I can think of, this is why I hate thinking too much.
I stood up from the chair and before leaving, I first saw a glimpse of my features in the mirror reflecting my entire appearance. I wore a dress so feminine I can't believe I even endured dressing up like a doll, I don't dress in exaggerated attires, I'm more common with plainclothes so looking at myself in this full-size mirror makes me wonder, why Seira?
Or perhaps when will I remember the things I needed to know?
This person in front of me is not me but I didn't have the guts to fight it.
Let's leave it like that, maybe soon, I might recall something so that my question can be answered as well.
--+-•-+--
I arrived at the dining area with Anna, she then helped me to a seat beside my father, just barely noticing that he was there. When I look at him, he really does resemble Seira so much that both of his eyes are tempting in pleasure blue, just like Seira's crystalline sky blue eyes that glimmer after the daylight.
"Greetings father, I apologize for greeting you quite late, how have you been? " I formally greeted as if he were my commander in a battle that I needed to be considerate with, guess I can't leave habits behind.
He looked at me for a while before he scratched the back of his head. "You don't call me papa quite often, I'm concerned, are you alright? " Oh, did Seira usually calls her father, or her dad instead? I don't know much about family bonds and relationships so I wasn't sure.
"Do you want me to call you dad? Father? If that's what you command--- " I bite my tongue to stop them from talking, that was too close, to begin with, when I looked at father, his eyes weren't confused but rather surprised.
Did he perhaps?
"Command? Why would I command my own daughter to do what she doesn't like? " I remained silent and left grasping for the awkward sensation of the wind. So he did hear me, I am not aware that my habits will come in handy.
"My apologies, I slip a tongue, I didn't mean anything, " my tone is so formal that I don't sound like Seira, Anna told me that I'm too formal as if I don't belong to this world nor I'm not a Crambell.
Jeez, guess, even manners don't change after death.
My father frowns and he raises his fork. "Something must happen with you to that lake, I can't see my daughter in you anymore, now tell me Atina, what is really wrong? " He asked and I ended up closing the tips of my lips.
I haven't really regained my memories so it's hard to answer his question.
I remained silent before I shrugged my head and stunned myself. "I'm-- sorry, I don't know, I'm not sure, " I said.
"Atina, " he called and I looked at him. Father patted my head so much that it gives me the warmth of a father that I haven't experienced from my past life, he then smiles at me pointing the beef on my mouth.
I nodded and took a bite of the beef before Anna gave me the plate of my breakfast. "It's fine if you don't know, I'm always with you no matter what you decide, okay? " He doesn't look like the empire's head knight from the way he speaks to his daughter nor how he acts.
I realize that my face turned red, maybe because of the embarrassment but when I looked at the father I wasn't aware that his smile was trying to break the ice of the wall inside my cold breezing heart. I'm surprised I can feel this way, I haven't been feeling a lot joyful in my life previously but this warmth reminded me of that moment when Iris gives me the warmest smile she can gather despite being sad.
"....." I quickly realized that my face appears to be getting more blushing so I shoved myself with the food in front.
"How are you these days, Atina? I heard you're doing exercises, that's good, " he said complimenting a small achievement Seira had done, my father wasn't like him. Even the smallest thing, he is disappointed with me, I'm not sure why but I rather not seek my past life as much as possible.
"...."
"Yes, I wanted to become strong, that's why I'm doing the best as I can fath-- " I stopped and looked at him before I looked away.
"Papa--- "
"How about you, I don't often see you so I always wonder, " when I turn back, he looks so happy, maybe because I called him papa the way Seira used to call him, although it was embarrassing at first, I tried the best I could to hide my embarrassment.
I wasn't like this but I welcome changes, I want to explore more now that this life was given to me... I want to escape the thought of being a tool forever...
Iris showed me that...
"My... Do you miss me that often? " he smiled and then he poked the fork in his mouth. "The affair of the empire is big, such as I manage every asset of the military militia so it wasn't easy, I'm glad you're very thoughtful of me. " I see, he was really a busy man.
I just shrugged off and ate my breakfast. I usually eat alone but this new kind of experience isn't that bad either. I didn't realize I was smiling while thinking about this new life, even though I'm not sure about my memories before Seira jumped off the lake. I am sure that this life fits me more to whichever the reason is.