Raize’s Point of View…
Everyone went upstairs. Galing ako sa may pool dahil nakalimutan ko yung phone ko sa may table. I also cleaned up a bit dahil lahat sila ay pumasok na sa bahay. After that, sumunod na rin ako sa kanila.
“Raju...”
Halos atakihin ako sa puso nang bigla akong may narinig na boses sa may counter nang dumaan ako. It’s Jam.. This man is really – nevermind.
“Gulat ka? Ang galing ko ‘no? Nagulat na naman kita.” pang aasar niya.
May hawak siyang baso. It’s coffee, obviously. I can tell it kahit na hindi ko nakikita dahil sa tapang ng amoy. Ininom niya iyon ng mabilis sa isang bagsak.
“Oh, i made one for you rin pala. Pansin ko kasi kanina, mabilis kang napa amin ni Hyze dahil may tama ka na sa alak.”
Pinalapit niya ako sa may counter and gave me the cup of coffee that he made. The moment I took a sip of it, halos iluwa at ibuga ko sa kaniya yung nainom ko.
“Jam, what the..?”
“Why? It’s coffee, what do you expect? Siyempre mapait yan.” Umiling iling pa siya. I understand that this drink is coffee and may tendency talaga na mapait. But this tastes like a nightmare, what the hell?!
“Ilang shots?”
“Sampu...”
Sampu?!
He’s really something when it comes on making coffee. SAMPU?! That is surely enough to keep me awake the whole day until the next morning.
“Okay, i’m good, naglaho na yung antok ko kanina Jam...” I was a bit annoyed for some reasons, but to be clear, it’s not because of the coffee. “I’m going upstairs, huwag kang malikot kapag tumabi ka sa higaan. Or better, kay Jaiden ka nalang tumabi para masolo ko nalang yung higaan.”
“You sure na matutulog ka na?”
“Yes, why?”
“Final answer?”
“OO NGA.” Ang kulit eh. Sinabi na nga na matutulog na ako, ulit ulit ba dapat?
“Makulit ba ako? Sorry naman.” Napakamot siya sa ulo.
I was about to leave him, but I stopped, to ask him kung saan ba siya matutulog. I don’t like leaving my door open kapag natutulog ako.
“Okay. So, are you sleeping with me or with Jaiden? Para alam ko kung ilo-lock ko yung pintuan.”
The last time na hindi ako nag lock ng pinto, Hyze pulled a prank on me. He told me that he is going to sleep in our room, so I left the door unlocked. Pagkagising ko, wala siya sa tabi ko dahil nakitulog pala siya sa ibang kwarto, and worst, may dinosaur nang naka drawing sa left cheek ko. I’ve learned my lessons, never again.
“Hmm, matutulog ka na talaga? Wala ka bang nakalimutan?”
“Jam...” I paused for a while because I really don’t have the energy to play round with him. Kailangan kong magtimpi dahil baka masapak ko siya. “Okay, give me a reason kung bakit hindi muna ako matutulog.”
“Wala naman, ikaw na mag isip. Pero matulog ka na sige kung gusto mo. Pag nakatulog ka na bago ako pumasok, tatabi na lang ako kay Jaiden.” He made me more confused by saying na ako nalang daw ang mag isip. He gave me a tricky smile afterwards.
This time, umalis na talaga ako. I switched the lights off in the living room, and also sa may pool area bago ako umakyat. Hindi sila marunong magpatay ng ilaw. Jam sometimes does it, but most of the time, NO.
I was about to step up the stairs, but suddenly, I remembered what happened earlier. When Jaymee went to the washroom... Wait, what happened after that? He hasn’t told me that yet.
Is that the reason why Jax keeps on asking me if I’m really going to sleep?
Mabilis akong naglakad pabalik sa counter at nandoon pa rin si Jam, mukhang hinihintay ako.
“Kita mo na? Sabi na eh, hindi ka pa matutulog.” This little not-so-angel is smirking right now while looking at me.
“Fine, tell me. What happened kanina? You followed her. You stood up when I was just about to. Inunahan mo’ko. So now, speak. What really happened?”
“Do you expect me to just sit back and do nothing? And what are you thinking ba kanina ha? You really want to follow her, huh? And then what? Magagalit siya sa’yo? Then both of you will make a scene?” He sighed. “Nevermind, let’s talk upstairs, huwag dito Raju...”
Hindi ko na siya hinintay pa at nauna na akong umakyat sa kwarto. Hindi nagtagal at sumunod na rin siya. He sat in the couch near the bed, habang ako naman, nasa may kabilang sofa, malapit sa window.
“Ok, continue speaking whenever you want.”
“Pissed off ka ba sa sinabi ko?”
“Konti.” Well, I don’t have any reasons to lie. I’m really pissed sa sinabi niya at lalo na sa ginawa niya kanina. He stopped me when I was about to stand up. But he has a point.
“Raju, sinasabi ko lang naman yung nakikita ko. By the way, I’ll continue na. Pati yung panenermon ko itutuloy ko na rin.” Umayos siya ng upo. “Well, first of all, hindi kita hinayaan na habulin mo siya hanggang sa washroom dahil baka bigla kayong mag away. She hasn’t seen you for couple of years bro after you broke her heart, siyempre, expected na baka may galit pa rin siya sa iyo. O talagang may galit pa sa iyo ‘yon.” Jam said. I just nodded, he has a point. Mali ako, tama siya, and I must admit that.
“But the thing is, she’s acting like today is the first time that he met me nung kinausap ko siya.”
“What do you mean?”
She’s acting like today is the first day that she met us? I mean, for Charlie, Jwilian, Martin, and Jaiden, today might be really the first time. But for me and Jam, no, this is not the first time for sure.
“Nung tinawag ko yung pangalan niya, she responded, ‘oh, ikaw si Jam di ba?’. Bro, Jaymee never called me Jam kahit na iyon ang tawag mo sa akin dati pa. She calls me Jax dahil ang angas daw pakinggan. Gusto ko sanang mag sorry sa kaniya dahil hindi siya komportable na kasama tayong dalawa sa mga barkada ni Hyze, pero ang sabi niya, bakit naman daw siya magiging uncomfortable around us? Noong una, ang sabi niya, ‘si Julian?’, but then she realized it kaya nagsalita ulit siya, ‘bakit naman ako magiging uncomfortable sa inyong dalawa ni Raju?’. She’s calling you Raju now, even though we both know na gustong gusto ka niyang tinatawag na Julian. Ang sabi pa niya, hindi daw siya magiging uncomfortable around us dahil mga kaibigan tayo ni Hyze, but it’s obvious na hindi siya komportable.”
Yeah right, I agree. I admit, hindi ko maialis ang titig ko kanina sa kaniya. The moment na bumaba ako mula sa second floor at pumunta sa may pool at nakita siya, biglang bumalik ang lahat sa akin. I suddenly remember the moment that I first saw her, the first time that she approached me, the first time that she smiled to me,... Everything came back.
I suddenly felt the urge of talking to her kaya gusto ko sana siyang sundan. But Jam is right, hindi pwede.
At hanggang kaninang bago siya pumasok sa kwarto niya ay nakatingin pa rin ako sa kaniya. She’s still looks the same,..
Still the prettiest. Her eyes, her lips, her nose... her cheeks are still cute. Whoa, this is crazy.
“By the way, dahil nga sinundan ko siya kanina,.. When she entered the washroom, I heard her sobbing. I don’t know why... Maybe, you do?”
“How would I know why?”
“Ewan ko rin, baka nga lang alam mo di ba kaya sinasabi ko sa’yo.”
It’s impossible na ako ang dahilan kung bakit umiiyak siya. I’m sure she’s happy with Hyze now.
“Baka naman namali ka lang ng dinig?”
“Hindi mo ba napansin yung mukha niya kanina nung umupo siya? Bagong hilamos. Bakit naman siya maghihilamos out of nowhere?”
“To remove makeup?”
“That makes sense, but is unecessary. Bigla bigla nalang magtatanggal ng make-up?”
“Hindi ko alam Jam, ikaw yung sumunod eh.”
“Eh kaya nga, sinasabi ko lang naman kung ano yung narinig ko. Basta ang narinig ko umiiyak siya kanina. But, she’s fine right?”
“Walang umiiyak na okay Jam.”
“But we should at least assume that she’s okay. It’s for the best, Raju. Alangan namang isipin natin na hindi siya okay dahil nakita ka niya?”
Wala akong naisagot. Hindi ko alam. May okay ba na umiiyak? I mean, except for tears of joy. Why would she bother to ask for the directions of the washroom kung tears of joy lang din naman ang iluluha niya.
“Alam mo Ju, matagal na kayong tapos dahil tinapos mo. Makipagtulungan na lang tayo sa kaniya. Gayahin natin siya. If she acts like ngayon lang niya tayo nakilala, then we should do the same. Maybe, that is how she wants this to go.”
“Then what about Hyze? Are we going to keep this a secret to him?”
“Si Jaymee ang magdedesisyon niyan dahil siya ang karelasyon ni Hyze. For sure, iniisip na rin ni Jaymee iyan ngayon.”
Oh right, maybe it’s for the best to just go with how Jaymee acts. She surely loves Hyze, right? She wouldn’t do anything to hurt him.
Ayoko rin kasing umaasta kami na para bang may tinatago kami. I know, it’s not that necessary for everyone to know, but I think, Hyze needs to.
But I’m still bothered about the fact na umiyak siya sa washroom. She still cries everywhere. She’s still unable to hold her tears back.
“By the way, did you see her kanina? Nung uminom siya?” I said in a confused tone. I mean, the Jaymee that I know is definitely not the Jaymee that I saw kanina. She treats alcohol like water. Walang patid yung pag inom niya.
“Yeah. I did. I also heard her say na nung college siya natuto...”
“Right.. College surely stressed her kaya natuto siya.”
“Or rather, you leaving her stressed her so much kaya kahit ayaw niya, nalaman niya kung paano... What do you think?”
“No. That is... That’s impossible Jam. Jaymee...” Napatingin ako kay Jam, at nakatingin siya sa akin like I did something so wrong, “She’s stronger than that.”
“Okay,.. Okay.. Sabi mo eh.”
She’s stronger than that, right? She will never ruin herself over a man like me na hindi man lang kayang tumupad ng mga pangako.
“Lagi akong wala dito because of different projects, at aware ka naman doon. Hindi mo talaga nalaman na si Jaymee ang girlfriend ni Hyze?”
“Raju, hindi. Kase kung nalaman ko na dati pa, malamang at nasabi ko na iyon sa iyo. Atsaka ang sabi nila, they kept it lowkey. Sige nga sabihin mo, paano ko malalaman kung lowkey lang yung relationship nila?”
Right... Oo nga pala.
“Okay, Raize, that’s it for me. Inaantok na’ko. Hindi ako tinablan nung kape. Goodnight bro.” He said in a quite sleepy voice. He even yawned after saying that. Dahan dahan siyang naglakad papunta sa kama atsaka humiga. In less than five minutes, he’s already fast asleep.
I remained silent while sitting on the sofa. I rested my head on the wall behind me while my mind is still in a deep mess. After meeting her again, I suddenly wondered... Is she still mad at me?