"You're here again?"
I heard a voice coming from my back.
"Matt." I uttered while giving him a short glance, then go back to where I am looking at awhile ago.
"You're still having that dream?" he asked. I didn't reply.
"Gwen." he said, as if waiting for my answer. Sa ibang direksyon ko ibinaling ang paningin ko when I felt his presence beside me.
"No." walang gana kong sagot. I took a sip of black coffee I bought earlier.
I heard him scoffed.
"You can't lie to me, Gwen Michelle."
I looked at him with my blank expression. Pero imbes na tingnan ako pabalik ay itinuon niya ang paningin sa tinitingnan ko kanina pa.
"I know you the most. And you can't deny that." he added.
My expression suddenly soften kaya umiwas ako ng tingin.
"Hindi man kita maintindihan minsan, but I'm still trying. Nakakainis man minsan ang mga desisyon mo, but I still care." he said in a low voice, enough for me to hear.
There's a long silence between us, until he sighed deeply kaya napatingin ako sakanya.
Hinarap niya 'ko then he crossed his arms. Nagbago na din ang expression niya. From a serious one to a... childlike brat.
Salubong ang mga kilay niya pero natural na mapupungay pa rin ang mga mata.
He's slightly pouting right now which is giving me the creeps. Gosh.
Parang ready na siyang pagsabihan o pangaralan ako.
"Alam kong nandito ka palagi sa adjacent rooftop building na 'to para sulyapan si Ms. Perez from her floor building. And I know na ganito ka kaagang pumapasok sa office kapag napapanaginipan mo ang gabing yun, when in fact, third person ka lang naman from that scene in the past. Kumbaga, witness. Narinig at nakita mo lang kung ano yung nangyari. Hindi ikaw ang mismong naka-experience. So I really can't understand why you're affected to that extent, Gwen."
It felt like my heart was pierced again when he said those words.
Naalala ko na naman lahat ng narinig at nakita ko that time.
I wasn't hurt for myself. I'm deeply hurt because I saw the person I love the most that night, being broken and in so much pain. I can't forget those eyes. And I wasn't able to do anything. And that was. . . heartbreaking.
Maging ako, hindi ko alam kung bakit ganito ang nararamdaman ko.
Hindi ko alam kung kelan lumalim ng ganito ang pagtingin ko sa isang taong ni hindi ako kilala. Hindi niya nga ata alam maging ang existence ko.
"I thought you've almost moved on." he added.
I maintained a straight face.
"I did." I replied.
"I think you're n---"
"It's nearly 8, Sir. We should go back to your office and have some work done." I said after showing him my wrist watch.
And yes. He's my boss.
Sean Matteo Ortiz, the CEO of O2 Corporation.
And I am Gwen Michelle Ortiz, his secretary.
Why do we have the same surname?
Well, it's for you to find out.
++++++++++++++++++++++
"Your meeting with the Arizon Trading at 6PM was cancelled because of an emergency, sir. He requested for a rescheduled---"
"It's a no. You know me well, Ms. Gwen. I don't give second chances to those people who are wasting my time. Especially when it's not a win-win situation. Sila lang naman ang may malaking benefit sa magiging agreement sana namin. Pinagbigyan ko lang because I know the grand Arizon. Kung anong---"
"Mr. Ortiz!"
Sabay kaming napatingin sa pintuan nang may biglang pumasok.
Nakita ko ang saglit na pagpikit ni Mr. Ortiz, na parang nagsasabing 'Okay. Another problem is coming. Again.'
"What's the problem this time, Mr. Romero?" kalmadong tanong niya.
Pumwesto ako sa gilid while maintaining my straight posture.
Naghabol muna ng hininga si Mr. Romero bago magsalita.
"A-Ano nang gagawin natin---" he paused when he saw the glass of water at the side of Mr. Ortiz's table.
"Pardon me, sir." he continued bago niya inumin yun nang walang tinira kahit isang patak. Napangiwi ako nang huminga siya nang malalim after niyang uminom.
I know he's a close friend of the CEO. Tho ten years ata ang tanda nito sakanya na hindi naman gaanong halata.
He's not always like this as the President or the second-in-command of this company. They are professionals especially at work. Maybe he's just pressured again with this new problem. And maybe kailangan niya talaga ng tubig sa lagay niya ngayon.
I stopped myself from laughing when I saw his expression nang mapatingin siya sa mukha ni Mr. Ortiz.
Parang biglang naging maamong tuta. Pft.
"Ehem. So, uhm... Wait. Ano na nga ba--- ah!" sabi nito na parang natauhan din sa wakas. Bumalik na naman ang itsura niya kanina na parang nanlulumo.
Mr. Ortiz crossed his arms while leaning back on his swivel chair at mas sumeryoso ang mukha.
"The secretary of Ms. Perez already quitted. I heard they had a scene awhile ago. Nakita nalang daw ng mga employees na lumabas si Ms. Natasha sa office ni Ms. Perez kanina habang umiiyak. Hindi na daw 'to papasok dahil hindi na niya matatagalan ang attitude ng dakilang evil leader ng Marketing Department." sabi niya na parang paiyak na.
Pansin ko ang pagsulyap sakin ni Mr. Ortiz. Pagkatapos ay bumaling ulit kay Mr. Romero.
"So...?" Mr. Ortiz asked. Kaya napanganga ang kausap niya.
"Anong so?? Of course it's a big problem! Launching na ng new set of products in less than a month. So this is a hell month for all of us. Each department leader needs a secretary lalo na kapag ganito ka-busy." he explained.
"I know that, Mr. Romero. My point is, what solution do you have?" the CEO asked calmly.
Dahan-dahang napakamot ito sa ulo.
"Ano ba naman yan. Kaya nga ako pumunta dito para manghingi ng pwedeng solusyon." he whispered while faking a wide smile. I know Mr. Ortiz didn't hear that but I did.
Gustuhin ko mang matawa pero hindi ko magawa dahil sa narinig kong problema tungkol kay Ms. Perez.
"Maybe---"
"I can be her secretary temporarily." I said, cutting off Mr. Romero.
Sabay silang napatingin sakin.
Medyo nakakunot ang noo ni Mr. Ortiz.
At gulat din ang expression nung isa pero nagbago rin kalaunan. Parang nagningning yung mata eh, saying things like 'You're a savior, Ms. Gwen!'
"Waaaahhh talaga Ms, Gwen?? Thank you! Thank you talag---"
"No." Mr. Ortiz firmly said. Kami naman ang sabay na lumingon sakanya.
He looked at me.
"You can't leave me here Gwen. I need you too. We could just---"
"With all due respect Sir, we both know na mas kailangan ako ngayon ni Ms. Perez. At wala na tayong oras para maghire pa ng ibang secretary. An interview alone is quite a time waste in this situation we have. Maybe Mr. Romero could temporarily substitute my role. I'm sure he can do both my roles and his, as the President. And besides, you still have other secretaries, right? Tsaka mas mapapadali pa ang pagreport ni Mr. Romero sayo kung magkasama kayo. Alam din naman nating siya lang ang makaka-handle sayo maliban sakin. At alam kong alam mo na ako lang din ang kayang maghandle sa mga taong katulad ni Ms. Perez." I calmly explained. Though my heart is beating hella fast.
I'm nervous but. . . I could also feel the excitement?
Hays. Whatever.
Mabilis na tumango-tango si Mr. Romero para sumang-ayon sa sinabi ko.
"She's right Mr. Ortiz. Ang main role ko naman talaga as the President is to make a daily report and help you with all I've got. So I think, that's the perfect thing to do. At isa pa. . . ayoko namang makatrabaho directly si Ms. Perez 'no. Baka maaga akong mamatay sa sama ng loob. Nako! Kung alam niyo lang ang ugali ng isang yun. Hindi siya yung warfreak-like na mabunganga sa mga sagutan pero yung expressions at mga pagsagot niya na minimal nga lang, pero mapanakit naman. Ay ewan. Naiisip ko pa nga lang parang mahihimatay na 'ko---"
"Ehem!" I interrupted. Buti naman at tumigil na siya sa pagsasalita dahil kita ko na naman ang madilim na aura ni Mr. Ortiz. At isa pa, hindi ko rin nagugustuhan ang mga sinasabi niya tungkol kay Ianne--- I mean, Ms. Perez.
Pansin kong napahawak si Mr. Ortiz sa sintido niya at medyo nakapikit pa.
Maya-maya lang ay tumingin siya sakin. With his worried eyes.
"What if---" he paused for a few seconds.
Then sighed deeply, as if he surrendered.
"Okay then." he continued.
Napa-yes si Mr. Romero at hindi ko sinasadyang mapangiti nang medyo malawak.
I just realized it when Mr. Ortiz gave me a soft expression na ako lang ata ang nakapansin.
Sandali lang yun dahil pasimple siyang nag-iwas ng tingin. Kaagad ko din namang binawi ang mga ngiti kong nagkusa. Tsk.
"You can leave, Mr. Romero. Ba't ka pa nakatunganga diyan?" baling sakanya ni Mr. Ortiz.
Medyo napakunot ako ng noo nang makita kong medyo nakanganga si Mr. Romero habang nakatingin sakin.
"W-What?" I asked, puzzled.
Hindi pa rin siya sumagot hanggang sa binato siya ni Mr. Ortiz ng isang crumpled paper na saktong tumama naman sa ulo nito.
"What the hell is your problem Romero?" may halong inis na tanong ni Mr. Ortiz.
Sunod-sunod na pagkurap at pag-iling ang ginawa ni Mr. Romero na parang natauhan.
"A-Ah. H-hehe. Kasi...A-Ano... Ngayon ko lang kasi nakita yung ganoong klase ng ngiti ni Ms. Gwen. Try mo kayang mag-smile palagi. Baka sakaling mahawa 'tong si Sir--- Ah! Siguro masaya ka ngayon dahil 'di mo na laging makakasama sa trabaho 'tong si Mr. Ortiz, ano? Hahahahahahaha--- aww!" daing niya nang may tumama ulit sa ulo nito. Pft.
Buti nalang ay nasalo pa rin niya yung clearbook.
"I've warned you about laughing inside my office." Mr. Ortiz said.
"Review those papers and give your report before midnight. You won't like it if you're a second late." he added.
Sobrang seryoso nang pagkakasabi niya na pati ako ay nakaramdam ng lamig sa batok.
Mukhang magrereklamo pa si Mr. Romero pero hindi na niya tinuloy.
Dahan-dahan itong tumalikod at nakita ko ang matatalim nitong tingin, sabay ng pag-nguso niya na parang bata, bago tuluyang lumabas sa office.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
MATT.
"Are you mad because I drove instead?" medyo nagulat ako sa biglaan niyang pagsalita. Kanina pa kasi kami walang imikan. I mean, I'm the one whose been silent all the way.
And yes. Siya ngayon ang nagdrive para ihatid ako pauwi. Tsk.
Ano ba kasing katangahan ang ginawa nung driver ko at na-sprain ang paa nun. -__-
"No." I answered.
Hindi naman talaga yun ang main reason.
I'm not mad tho. I'm just worried.
Narinig ko ang paghinga niya nang malalim kaya napatingin ako sakanya sa rearview mirror. I'm at the backseat by the way.
"Alam ko naman kasing pagod ka dahil sa trabaho. Lalo na ngayong araw. Baka mamaya mapaaga ang punta natin sa langit 'no. Ayoko pa. I'm not qualified enough." she said, tryin' to be funny.
One side of my lip raised a li'l bit. Pero hindi ko pinahalata. Tumingin lang ako sa labas ng car window.
"Pa'no pa ko?" mahina kong sabi pero sapat lang para marinig niya.
I heard her soft laugh and it made my heart melt.
I love hearing her laughs. I love seeing her smiles. Na sobrang dalang lang mangyari. Karamihan ay hindi pa totoo, like those compulsory smiles in business.
"Don't worry, Matt. I can handle myself." she said after a long silence.
I looked at her through the rearview mirror once again and I saw her reassuring smile. Tho she's looking directly at the driveway.
I just sighed.
I hope so, Gwen.
You're the most important person to me besides my parents.
I want you to be truly happy and I don't want you to be in pain.
Because you deserve to have smiles, not tears.