"Why did you do that?"
I really can't think of a reason why he did that. Sana pala hindi ko na hinayaang siya ang magpasa ng mga sagot ko kahapon.
I don't want to get a high score or a high grade if I am not the one who worked hard for it. What he did was basically cheating. Para na rin akong nandaya kahit pa hindi naman talaga dahil siya ang gumawa ng bagay na iyon.
He slowly turned his head on me. He finally eyed me, guilt was filling his eyes.
"I saw your answers and some of it were---" Hindi ko na siya pinatapos sa kaniyang salita at kaagad ko nang dinugtungan ito.
"Wrong." I dictated. I avoided his gaze because of embarrassment.
Math really sucks, I hate it.
Humugot siya nang malalim na hininga bago ko narinig ang pagpapatuloy niya sa kaniyang dahilan.
"Tapos hindi mo nalagyan ng pangalan 'yung papel mo." Dali-dali akong nag-angat ng tingin sa kaniya.
"I didn't?" I tried to recall the moment when I was answering our quiz.
My mouth formed an 'o'.
Oh, crap! Tuloy-tuloy nga lang pala ako sa pagsasagot kahapon dahil natatakot akong hindi ko masagutan lahat ng items kahit alam kong magiging mali naman ang mga 'yon.
"Since you didn't write your name on your paper, I wrote my name on it instead. Then, I erased my name on my paper and wrote yours." I let out a loud breath and shook my head.
Napakagat siya sa kaniyang labi ngunit seryoso pa ring nakipaglabanan ng tingin. He didn't look away this time but guilt was still surrounding his eyes.
"I'll tell our teacher about it." I stated with finality in my voice. I was about to stand up when he gently held my wrist.
"Please, don't. I'm sorry, hindi na mauulit." He pleadingly stared at me. Ilang beses siyang umiling-iling.
Binawi ko ang aking kamay sa pagkakahawak niya at hindi na itinuloy ang binabalak.
"Hindi na talaga mauulit. You shouldn't have done that. I'll never really talk to you if that will happen again." An emotion crossed his eyes but I couldn't tell what it was because it faded instantly.
Nawalan ng buhay ang kaniyang mukha at saka tumayo. Naglakad din siya papalabas ng room. Is he upset? I'm just telling him that I don't want him to do that again. I don't really deserve that score. Did he do that out of pity?
Bumuntong-hininga ako at napatingin sa kisame ng room. Hindi ko na rin namalayang lumabas na ang mga kaklase ko dahil break time na. The bell already rang.
I stood up and fixed my things first before heading to the canteen since I'm already starving. Iniwan ko na lang ang mga gamit ko sa room. Wala namang ibang taong kukuha niyon. I just brought my wallet with me.
Dala-dala ang tray, naglakad-lakad ako at humanap ng pwesto. The canteen was full but I gladly found a vacant seat. Umupo ako roon at ipinatong sa ibabaw ng lamesa ang tray na naglalaman ng mga pagkaing binili ko.
While I was busy eating, I frowned when I felt someone was looking at me. I dropped the utensils and slowly lifted up my gaze and there, I met a pair of gray eyes. Bahagyang nanlaki ang mga mata niya at kaagad ding umiwas ng tingin, mukhang nahihiya pa.
He was silent while his friends were noisy, as usual. Nothing new. I just finished my food before going back to our room.
"Get one and pass." Sabi ng teacher namin sa English.
Katatapos lang naming magquiz at kinolekta niya ang aming mga papel.
The papers of the students on the first and second row will be checked by the students on the third and fourth row. Then, vice versa.
Inabot ko ang huling papel na pinapasa ng kaklase kong nasa unahan ko. I took a peek on the paper. Our teacher started dictating the correct answers. Noong tapos na ay inutusan niya na kaming ibalik 'yon sa may-ari.
I got up and went to the fourth row. I silently handed the paper to Zillian. Sa kaniya kasi ang papel na napunta sa akin. Lahat ng mga sagot niya ay tama. Tinanggap niya iyon at tumango kaya naman bumalik na ako sa upuan ko.
Until the class was finally over, he didn't really bother talking to me. He was distant the whole day until the following days. Walang nangungulit sa akin ngunit bakit parang nakakapanibago? Ganito naman na ang buhay ko dati, hindi ba?
"Attention." Zillian strictly mouthed that made our classmates stopped talking. Their attentions were now focused on our class president.
His hands were inside his pockets while leaning on the door of the classroom. He was giving us his cold stares.
"Our last subject teacher will not discuss today. May emergency meeting daw ang lahat ng high school teachers." They all cheered after he announced that.
Kaniya-kaniya na sila ng plano sa kanilang mga gagawin at ang iba nga ay nagsisilabasan na, bitbit ang mga gamit nila. I also started putting my things inside my backpack.
I will just commute, I guess. I don't wanna bother Kuya Danny. Nagpapahinga pa siya ngayon sa mga oras na ito, ayaw ko siyang istorbohin dahil mamaya pa naman talaga ang oras ng uwian namin.
My hands have their own minds, they automatically stopped when Zillian went to my side. Bakit bigla siyang tumabi? Parang wala lang nangyari, a'.
Bahagya ko siyang sinulyapan gamit ang sulok ng aking mga mata. He would open his mouth like he wanted to mutter a thing but he'll just close it instantly. Paulit-ulit niyang ginawa iyon hanggang mapapadyak na siya sa lapag. Napapikit pa siya nang mariin. Parang siraulo.
"Bati na tayo." It was almost a whisper. He was pouting like an ugly duckling.
"Sorry na." He even added. Pinagdikit niya pa ang kaniyang mga palad na para bang nananalangin.
"I'll never really do that again. I swear! Pansinin mo na ako."
He was the one who didn't talk to me. He was the one who ignored me for days.
"You said you'll never really talk to me again." Sadness clouded his features while murmuring that.
Kagat niya pa ang kaniyang labi habang matiim na nakatitig sa akin. Mukha siyang inapi.
I told him that I'll never really talk to him if he did that again. Pero hindi ko naman sinabing hindi ko na siya papansinin simula noong nag-usap kami, hindi pa naman niya ginagawa uli at hindi na niya dapat ulitin 'yon. May isang salita ako.
Isinukbit ko na ang strap ng aking bag sa balikat ko at tuloy-tuloy lang siyang nilampasan. I even heard him shouting my name repeatedly. I was already walking through the hallway without direction. I wanted to go home but there's also a feeling raging inside me that doesn't want to.
"Got you!" Zillian chuckled and grabbed my pulse.
Nanlaki ang mga mata ko noong sinimulan niyang tumakbo nang mabilis. Wala akong nagawa kundi magpadala dahil hawak-hawak niya ako.
"Where the hell are you taking me?!" I screamed but he just laughed and gave me a freaking wink.
Hinahabol ko na ang sariling hininga ko noong unti-unting bumagal ang pagtakbo namin. Nakarating na kami sa labas ng university! Medyo tirik pa ang araw dahil hapon pa lang naman.
"Hala! Sorry ulit!" He guiltily mumbled when he saw my state.
My entire body stilled when his hand reached for my forehead. He gently wiped the sweats off. Umawang ang labi ko habang nararamdaman ang pag-iinit ng aking pisngi kaya't dali-dali kong ipinilig ang ulo ko sa gilid upang hindi niya ako makita.
Habang sabay kaming naglalakad sa tabi ng kalsada ay bigla niyang pinagpalit ang pwesto namin. Nasa gilid na ako at siya naman ay nasa tabi na talaga mismo ng kalsada kung saan maraming dumadaan na mga sasakyan. Kanina kasi ay roon ang pwesto ko.
"Where are we really going?" I annoyingly asked him and crossed my arms over my chest. His lips just formed into a reassuring smile.
Finally, he stopped walking after a few minutes. Huminto kami sa tapat ng isang kainan. Wala namang pinto ito kaya't kitang-kita ang mangilan-ngilang mga taong kumakain sa loob. Nauna na siyang pumasok at sinenyasan akong sumunod. I looked up to the signboard before following him inside.
He was already standing beside a table for two people, it was near the counter.
"Just sit here, I'll just order." He motioned me to sit down on a black stool.
I rolled my eyes at him before sitting. "Am I a dog?" l
He scratched his temple and heaved a deep sigh.
"Why are you always making me feel guilty?" I just shrugged my shoulders and placed my bag on my lap.
Iniwan niya rin ang sa kaniya. Pinapanood ko lang ang likuran niya habang naglalakad patungo sa counter.
I looked at the list of dishes and read some of it. Tapsilog, chicksilog, tosilog, hotsilog and many more with 'silog' at the end.
"Nanay Flor!" Since malapit lang sa counter ang pinili niyang pwesto, rinig na rinig ko ang pagsasalita niya.
A woman in her mid 50s suddenly showed up behind the counter. She smiled when she saw Zillian. Inabot ni Zillian ang kaniyang kamay at nagmano.
"Dalawang order po ng tapsi!" Magiliw niyang sabi.
Napalitan ng gulat ang ekspresyon ng babaeng kausap niya na tinawag niyang 'Nanay Flor'.
"Oh? Dalawa? May kasama ka, Quinn?" She curiously asked.
Zillian just nodded silently and glanced at my direction. Napatingin tuloy sa akin si Nanay Flor kaya naman tipid akong ngumiti bilang paggalang.
She laid her attention to Zillian again. Makahulugan siyang ngumiti muli at nagwika.
"Aba! Ikaw bata ka, may kasintahan ka na pala, ha." Nanunukso ang tono nito.
Nagsalubong ang kilay ko at napaawang din ang labi ko. Ngumisi lang si Zillian at sinabi uli ang order niya.
"Padamihan po ng sabaw, Nanay Flor! Salamat po."
"Why didn't you deny it?!" Mariin kong tanong at pinukol siya nang masamang tingin.
He stared at me with innocent eyes.
"Bakit? Kailangan ko bang itanggi?" Hindi ako makapaniwalang tumingin sa kaniya.
This man is really insane! Hindi ko alam kung nananadya ba siya o ano!
"Of course! She'll think that we're really together!" He was trying to stifle a smile. He didn't answer me, he just played with his hands and tapped it on the table.
Ilang minuto pa ang lumipas bago tinawag ni Nanay Flor si Zillian upang sabihing luto na ang order niya. He went back to the counter to get it. He put the tray above the table. Isa-isa niyang inalis ang mga laman niyon at inilapag sa harapan ko ang isang pinggan pati na rin ang mangkok na mayroong sabaw.
He moved the tray to the other table where no one was occupying. After that, he finally sat in front of me and clasped his hands.
"Kumakain ka ba nito?" Binalingan ko ang pagkain at saka muling nag-angat ng tingin sa kaniya.
Nag-aalangan pa akong sumagot. "Uhm, this is tapsilog, right?"
I saw the picture of it on the menu earlier so I'm already familiar with this.
"Oo, kumakain ka?" Dahan-dahan akong umiling sa kaniya.
I thought I will see disappointment in his eyes but he just remained smiling.
"Ngayon pa lang." Mahina kong bulong.
He licked his lower lip.
"Masarap 'to, promise! Tikman mo!"
Kinuha niya ang kutsara at tinidor na nasa gilid niya. Nilagyan niya ng fried rice at ulam ang kutsara bago inilapit sa tapat ng bibig ko.
I swallowed and stared at it for a long time.
"Nangangawit na 'ko, Faye." Reklamo niya kaya naman isinubo ko na ang pagkain at nahihiyang nag-iwas ng tingin.
Hinayaan ko munang manuot ang lasa nito. I nodded repeatedly and gave Zillian a thumbs up.
"Woah! This is delicious, Zillian!" I exclaimed and smiled.
The beef is really good! Plus the fried rice! Unti-unting nawala ang suot niyang ngiti at matagal na napatulala.
Lagi na lang siyang nawawala sa kaniyang sarili nang walang dahilan. I don't understand him as well sometimes. Just like our last subject teacher.
Noong nakabawi siya ay bumalik ang ngiti niya. His hand drifted above my head. He messed my hair and just stopped when I glared at him. That became his habit! Kada na lang makikita niya ako, ginagawa niya iyon.
"I told you. So, bati na tayo?" He hopefully murmured. I shrugged and started eating my own food.
"You know what? It was so hard ignoring you." He puffed out a breath.
I heard what he said even though it was already a whisper. Bahagya pa akong natigilan sa pagkain.
Sinimulan niya na ring maglagay ng pagkain sa kutsarang ginamit niya kanina para sa akin. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko noong malapit na ito sa bibig niya at handa na niyang kainin.
"Stop!" I panicked, confusion crossed his eyes. Nabitin tuloy sa ere ang kutsara.
"That's the spoon that you used to feed me earlier!" He raised a brow and became even more confused.
"And so?" He just smirked and continued putting the food inside his mouth.
I don't really know why it was a big deal for me. Siguro dahil hindi lang ako sanay.
The following days, Zillian went back to his usual self. That also means, he went back on disturbing me each day. He never failed to make me mad. Such a nuisance.
Natakasan ko siya noong break time na, kalalabas ko lamang ng canteen. I was just walking through the hallway since we still have a free time. I was looking at my phone when I bumped into someone.
"Tumingin ka nga sa dinadaanan mo!" Galit na wika ni Torri at inirapan ako.
"Paharang-harang." I didn't know she has an attitude.
Every time she's with Zillian, she was silent and sweet like a puppy.
Biglang may umakbay sa balikat ko habang nakatingin kay Torri. Lumipat ang tingin ni Torri sa braso ni Zillian na nakapulupot na sa akin ngayon. Pain surrounded her eyes. I'm not that dumb to not know the reason behind it. She obviously likes Zillian.
"H-hi, Quinn." She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes. Zillian just nodded at her.
"Do we have a session later?" Her voice became soft unlike earlier, when she shouted at me.
Zillian's brows drew together.
"Ah, yeah." Maikling tugon lang niya, lumaki naman ang ngiti ni Torri at pasimple pa akong nginisihan na para bang nanalo siya sa kung ano man.
"Let's meet later." Pahabol pa ni Torri bago tuluyang lampasan kami.
Napailing na lang ako sa kaloob-looban ko. Is she thinking that I am stealing Zillian from her?
"I think you should stay away from me."
It was the best decision. Ayaw kong mapasama sa gulo at baka kung ano pa ang masabi sa akin ni Torri.
Napabitaw si Zillian sa akin at bahagyang lumayo. His jaw clenched while pinning me with his eyes.
"Why?" His voice has no emotions at all.
"Torri was jealous." I said like it was the only answer to his question.
Lalo lang lumalim ang gatla sa kaniyang noo at saka nagtanong muli.
"Why would she? We're not even together. I know that she likes me but I already told her that I can't reciprocate her feelings."
That's why he was acting cold towards her but he was still tutoring her. What he did was alright so Torri will stop hoping for him. Pero sa inakto ni Torri kanina, mukhang umaasa pa rin siya. I can't blame her though. It's her feelings, not mine.
"I can't do what you're asking me." He dictated with a hint of finality in his voice.
My mind was full of questions right now but no words came out of my mouth.
"I like being with you, Faye."