"I was not always anti-love, or anti-men as you like to say, in fact, I enjoyed their attention, My beauty that I cover now, then I flaunted it around, I was just a Muslim by name and just prayed for praying sake, I didn't even feel a connection with Allah neither did I try to establish one." Nur narrated, tears forming in her eyes.
"When we lived in Kaduna 2 years back, we had a family friend, that friendship was established years before I was given birth to, so when I came to this world, my closest friend was from that family Amar Imam..
"A boy Nur?" Humairah asked not able to believe her ears, her stricty sunnah guided sister kept a non muharram as a close friend!!
"Yes a boy Mairah , The Nur you know now wasn't the Nur I was before."
"I and Amar were really close friends, Umma and his Mum even called us Husband and wife." she said as a sad smile made it way to her face.
"At first, it was just friendship but as we grew older, we started venturing toward a romantic direction, I thought I was lucky, I had everything, brains, beauty and a handsome rich and caring boy who loves me. In school I was the queen bee, every guy wanted to date me and girls wanted to be my friends."
" Before I left secondary school Amar had officially become my boyfriend "
"Did Umma approve of that? " Humairah cut in again.
Nur gave a dry laugh.
"Since the day Ummah stopped our sleepovers, it became evident Ummah didn't like Amar with me, so Amar stopped coming home, we met at different locations far from home, so mother was under the illusion that we had finally part ways." Nur explained.
"But why did Ummah not like him considering he is her friend's son?" Humairah inquired.
"What Ummah didn't like was his upbringing, she said he's too pampered and does whatever he wants to do and leaves that he does not wish to do. Abbah was a bit more lenient with him but they shared the same opinion." Nur answered.
"Oh that's why she stopped the sleepovers, she didn't want you guys together" Humairah said shaking her head as if finally putting together the puzzle.
"Maybe, but then she said no sensible mother will allow her 12 year old child have a sleepover with a 16 year old boy, anything can happen, she explained this to me immediately I saw my period, she told me no rough play with boys including Amar, he's not permitted to touch me, no dressing anyhow, no sitting anyhow and told me all the Ibadah that had become Fard for me, how I wish I actually listened to her counsel that time." Nur lamented, her eyes glistening with tears.
Humairah didn't know how to comfort her sister, she didn't know the right words to say. Though she didn't know the whole story, she could tell things became really ugly looking at how her confident sister was struggling to keep telling her the story.
After composing herself, Nur said
"Let's go and prepare dinner, I'll continue in the kitchen".
" OK, what are we going to make?" Humairah asked quietly.
"Yesterday we asked Ummah right, call Abbah and ask him what he would like to eat, meet me in the kitchen when you are done." Nur said as she left the room in a hurry in order to hide her tears from her sister, she was diving deeper into the story and she couldn't help it, the memories brought along with them streams of tears.
"This is going to be a long story." she muttered.
"Na'am Abbah, safe journey." Humairah said as she cut the phone.
"Nur, Dad said he has been craving jollof rice and roasted cat fish, he said u shouldn't forget his special cray fish." Humairah announced as she entered the kitchen.
"Ok then let's get to work." Nur said wearing her gloves.
"Emm Nur you promised to continue the story." Humairah said skeptically.
"I know and I will." Nur smiled as she turned to her sister.
"So, when I got admission into Ahmadu Bello university, we were seriously dating, he would come to visit me when he was not in school too. Thinking about it now, I can see how ridiculous I was, how could I have been dating at the age of 15, what gave me that confidence, I still can't say." Nur paused a little as she began to grind the pepper, onions, tomato and a little garlic.
When she was done, she continued.
"When I was in 100level, I came back for 2nd semester holiday but I didn't meet him at home, he was still in school, so throughout that holiday we only communicated through phone calls.
"Where was he schooling?" Humairah asked .
"Canada. Then he was almost done, I think his last year. He was pretty smart. Anyways, I went back to school and we kept communicating until one day he paid me a surprise visit. I can never forget that day, I still wish I could change my decisions that day.
"When he came, he called me and told me he was in front of Amina hostel, which was my hostel then, Wallahi I was overjoyed I jumped from my bed and began to look for what to wear. My roommate asked me why I was so happy and I told them.
"You mean that fine boy you showed me?" One of them asked.
"Yes."I replied, so proud to have him as my boyfriend"
"Noo, you have to dress to kill today, you know you have to keep his attention so that all those girls in his school will not snatch him." Another one chipped in.
"In fact, let me look for cloth for you. " she said.
Before I knew it, they were ransacking my locker and they brought out a red gown, that gown was beautiful, the only problem was it was too tight, Ummah even said I should give it out, I had even forgotten it was in my box."
"When I tried the cloth, complements were being thrown at me from every direction, so I decided, why not wear this for him?
After all it's the least I could do. I then did my make up,rolled my veil and when I looked into the Mirror, I knew I looked breathtaking. I came out of the hostel, all eyes on me I could feel the stares, some of admiration, some of disgust, I ignored all of them and then he turned around and saw me, his reaction was all I needed to believe I made the right decision, he couldn't take his eyes off me, his mouth was left ajar. When he finally got a hold of himself, he hurriedly came out of his car and ran to me, held my hand, came close to my ear and whispered.
"I can wait a thousand years to see you like this again, please let's hurry to the car I can't stand all the eyes watching you." He held my waist possessively and we proceeded to the car.
"Jaan, next time you are going to dress like this, please tell me in advance so that I can bring a driver, normally you look stunning but today, wallah I just want to hide you where only I can see you ." he said immediately we entered the car.
I felt like the most precious thing in the world, the luckiest of all, there was nothing I could have possibly wished for, at that moment I felt my life was complete, unknown to me that moment was just the bait to my destruction and unfortunately I took the bait.
Non English words and translation
Wallah - by Allah
Jaan - my love
Ibadah - worship
Fard - compulsory
Sunnah- the saying and doings of the prophet Muhammad (S.A.W).