I was born in one poor family but honest and very hard worker parents my parents working both every day ..my father was a steel man and my mom working like a cleaner for the road ..both was trying to give us the minimum life we needed ...I had one oldest brother and my youngest sister
the time I was born all over my country was in communism time and all the people was suffering the poor and the freedom to live...with his hard work my father reach to take a small apartment in the community housing that time and my mom working for our daily needs and that little food every day In our table. ...my parents never was political people and they never mixed up their life with the regime of that time ...until such date September 23 in the 1990 when everyone and every thing changed in my place
that day started a big protest from the students and the new ideology for sending down that last breath of communism we had ..everything was going fine till we learn also my father with his coworkers went in that protest for continuing the wish of freedom and the democracy in our life's...he didn't said this one to my mom and to anyone...even to he's eldest brother that time chief of police..
that day and the following days goes normal ..till 18 January 1991 when the sun becomes black and the cold reach our home...we was waiting for my father to come home to ear dinner with us but he didn't come till midnight...and my mom send us in the bed like always...the next morning was very crowded in my home and I saw my mom crying and shouting...I learn from my eldest brother...my father was in hospital..later on our eldest uncle make everything clear...my father was hurts by six people ex military while he was coming home ...they make massacre with him ...they hit with knife open the stomach and let him without any signs of leaving in the forest...a old woman found my father and reported in the police...in short my father was confined in hospital with 10percent chance of living that was the news my uncle give to my mom...my mom lost her feelings and my sister keep crying ...my eldest brother send us in the bed again and close our door..I tried to sleep ..after few minutes my eldest uncle take me in his home and my youngest sister was send in my grand parents mother side to live
..no one know for how long ..means they separated us bcs my mom needed to take care of my father
the days in the uncle house was so long and the nights so cold ...with out my father hug and my mom stories I was counting the flies and the mosquitoes every night no sleep ..I was only 4years old child and I don't know what going on..without my sister and brother ...alone I was like a leftover child ...they also stop me to go in the school..I was kindergarten bcs I started to read very early like a small bird..2 weeks has passed like a cold river and I was already missing everyone when my uncle told me we will go home today and I will hug my father...I was in the air very happy very excited...the time I enter home was really so crowded and they send me in my brother room ...I keep crying and hugging him I missed a lot...like that I fall asleep hugging him..after 2hours I meet my mom she also missed me a lot...my father I saw after 2 days ...we was not allowed to enter in his room bcs he was still suffering..after months go my father reach to recover and start to walk slowly after 8months ..and my uncle decided to send us all like family in one other city ...for protection and for avoiding my father revenge to those people who almost took his life.. was again September...when my father left the city and go in his uncle place found a small land and started to build a small house with light materials for us...November 1991 my mom my brother started to travel in that city...new life was awaiting for me and my family....we reach the place after 2 days travel ...our new place was in middle of one mountain surrounded by big forest and wild animals...our house was made of woods and plastic ...no electricity no water no road..just a quiet place and us..uncle of my father that time had a small goat farm and he's providing us some milk and cheese and that was our life till my father started a new job like driver of the carrier for the cow farm in the new city we was...the days rolling one by one and I was seeing many differences in my mom appearance...she become more thin and her eyes always crying..layer on I saw my father started to fight and hurting my mom almost every night...our uncle there told me my father start to drink alcohol...it was very annoying and so much hurts when I was listening my mother crying and begging for him to stop ...until my father in that way started to hurt also my eldest brother....we almost reach 2 years in that forest that new place when I found my brother was hang in one three upside down from .y father bcs he didn't go to find Alcohol for him...and my mom was starving and suffering in the corner of the house...also my sister crying and sometimes had be punch by our father when he was under alcohol ...I was lucky I never experienced it bcs I was almost living with the goat of our uncle in the other places...but always I was seeing how violent my father become..I was entering 7 years old in the grade one elementary...was our uncle who help us to get in school ..first day of the school was great till my father apparently there in front of my class very very drank also very dirty from the pants he opened the door and shout my name ...I was blushing and I hide down the table I know it was drunk my teacher call me to go there that was the first and last time my father touch me from the time he start the alcohol..after that day I keep avoiding my father bcs he's hurting me in the arms and most of the time he's slapping me without reason like my siblings and my mom too...from that day in the school I was shy to go back and I found some guys older than me they are not going at school as well but they having money and eating good things...I was surprised one of them give me a snickers chocolate bar...was the first time for me to taste and had 4pcs more...he told me to stay with them always...like that I found myself in older friendship and I started to like it..I was going rare at school almost never at home and all the time with this guys ...until I become 11years old they give me a wrapped gift in my birthday...we was hiding back of the school and I unwrap the gift...when I saw was a old hunting gun short model with 2 bullets in the housing...I took and run to hide it and I reach to Send in our animal house beside the house ...I cover good and I go to eat lunch my mom prepared already...late afternoon my father will come home so I go up in the roofing to see him from far and to announce to my mom if he's drunk or not..and like that my days keep rolling in middle of the tears poor life moaning from the pain of my mom and that cold air I was surrounded...