IN THE middle of the afternoon, I already got ready for our tour all around the Hacienda. At dahil ngayon lang ito mangyayari, I'm pretty excited about it.
It's been a while since I got here in Hacienda Olivar. Nung una kong punta dito, iyun ay sa kadahilanang ipapakilala ako ni Gwen sa kanila Tito. That's pretty nerve-racking but it goes well considering Tita and Tito are warm people. Sa pangalawa kong punta dito, sinamahan ko lang si Gwen dahil may naiwan ito doon. And the third time is when she needed to go out of the country for a month because of work. Ako na mismo ang kumuha sa kaniya dahil isang buwan rin kaming magkakahiwalay.
And now, the fourth time, we're actually going on an actual vacation. Knowing that the Hacienda is big, I'm pretty excited to see what's there to see. Sigurado akong hindi ako madi-disappoint.
But heck. I didn't even know that the first thing we'll see are horses. Talagang ayaw ko nito. Sa laki ba naman nila? Sinong magkakagustong sumakay doon? Paano kung mahulog kami? Damn. Sana lang talaga hindi ako pilitin ni Gwen na sumakay. I'll seriously run away from it.
"Babe!" Gwen excitedly called while pointing out the horses, "that's what I told you. Aren't they amazing?"
I glanced at the horses. Nasa loob pa ito ng kulungan nila at natatakot akong lumabas ito. There are five of them and they're pretty tall. Damn it. Ayaw kong sumakay diyan.
"Y-yeah," sagot ko kay Gwen, halos nauutal pa. "They're q-quite . . . amazing."
Tumango-tango siya habang nakatayo sa gilid ko, malayo sa mga kabayong kaharap namin. I heaved a breath and eventually fixed my camera. I don't really want to go closer. Pero kung gusto ni Gwen, wala akong magagawa.
"Babe," sambit ko, "come on. Pose for me."
"Okay, okay," nakangiti nitong sabi at unti-unting naglakad papunta sa mga kabayo. Ngunit kaagad itong tumigil matapos makalapit ng ilang hakbang. She's not even three step closer to them, "I'll stand here!"
I smiled. She's not really going closer? That thought made me chuckle. Siguro nahalata niyang ayaw kong lumapit.
"You can actually go closer if you like, babe." Kaagad kong sabi sa kaniya, "I don't mind."
"What? Are you crazy?" Bigla nitong sabi na ikinatigil ko kaagad.
Kunot-noo ko siyang tiningnan. Did I say something wrong?
"I won't get closer, babe. Paano kung maabot ako niyan? I'll seriously die, you know!" She exclaimed, totally surprising me.
Gwen, who spend her childhood here, doesn't like horses?
First time naming dalawa na magkasamang pumunta sa ganitong lugar. Pero hindi ko kailanman inisip na takot siya. I mean, she lived inside the Hacienda. She should be used to it, right?
"Babe, I'll pose for you na, okay?" aniya.
Wala akong ibang nagawa kundi ang mapatango. Siguro masyado lang siyang nagtagal sa syudad kaya hindi na siya nasanay. Yup. That's probably the reason.
Or maybe she just doesn't like it. Marami naman kasi siyang ayaw.
"Okay," inihanda ko kaagad ang camera. Nang itinutok ko iyun sa kaniya, kaagad siyang nag-pose.
I can't help but to smile seeing her smiling widely with her open arms, like she's showcasing the horses. Matapos ko iyung makuha, tinitigan ko ang litrato. Mas lalo akong napangiti dahil doon.
"Let me see!" Dali-daling tumakbo papunta saakin si Gwen. Nang tuluyan na siyang makalapit, ipinakita ko sa kaniya ang camera.
She smiled proudly, "aww. You're really the best, babe."
"Of course," I looked at her smugly, "a professional model needs a professional photographer. We're a match-made, you know?"
Mahina siyang natawa dahil doon, "that's pretty cliché. Pero dahil ikaw ang nagsabi, I'll try to accept it."
Tinalikuran niya ako. Kaagad naman na napaawang ang labi ko matapos marinig iyun, "hey! That's wrong! You should accept it whole-heartedly, babe!"
"No way!" Natatawa niyang sabi sabay takbo papalayo sa akin, "I said I'll try!"
"Gwen, you're teasing me again!" Kaagad ko siyang hinabol papalabas sa kwadro ng mga kabayo.
She laughed and tried to run faster. Napatawa naman ako nang makita iyun. Ngunit hindi ako nagpatalo. Mas binilisan ko ang paghabol sa kaniya na mas lalo niya lang tinawanan.
She's seriously teasing me right now, huh? Tingnan lang natin kapag nahabol ko na siya. Talagang hindi makakawala ang makulit na iyan saakin.
I laughed as we get out of the horse's quarters. Bumungad kaagad saamin ang malaking field kung saan pinapatakbo ang mga kabayong nasa loob. And that made me stopped.
I didn't saw this earlier. Sa harap kami dumaan at nasa likod ito. Seeing the vast field, it's quite amazing. Mas lalo lang akong nakakaramdam ng excitement sa isiping napakalaki nga talaga ng Hacienda.
Ngunit hindi lang ito ang nakapagpatigil saakin. I didn't just stopped from running, my whole body didn't move. Pati ang mga mata ko, hindi ko maialis sa babaeng nakasakay sa kabayo.
It's . . . Johanna.
She's smiling genuinely, laughing with Mae who's also riding a horse. And the way she handled it, it makes me think that it's not scary at all.
Sa abot-tenga niyang ngiti ngayon, hinding-hindi mo maiisip na nakakatakot ang mga kabayo. It's like she's riding it naturally and easily.
But what makes this moment weird is the fact that my body isn't moving, but my heart keeps on pounding so fast second after second. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ngunit hindi ko ito mapigilan.
"Babe!" Nagising kaagad ako nang marinig ang boses ni Gwen. I immediately turned my head on her, totally surprised.
"Y-yeah?" I asked, not knowing what's totally happening.
Napatawa siya ng mahina, "did you just give up on running after me?"
I stilled. Hindi kaagad ako nakasagot. I totally know that's a joke. But there's something in that joke that seems to . . . trigger me.
"You . . . you actually run fast," iyun lang ang tanging nasabi ko. Napatawa naman siya ng mahina at kaagad na lumapit saakin. She smiled at me and hold my hand.
"You can take a few photos here," she softly said. Napangiti ako habang nakatitig sa kaniya.
Feeling my heart who suddenly slowed down a bit, I squeezed her hands.
Nagpatuloy ako sa pagkuha ng mga litrato. There's a lot of nice things in here, I didn't even realize that we're already going home.
Kumain kaagad kami ng dinner nang makabalik kami sa Mansyon. Like yesterday, we all ate together. But this time, kasama na namin si Johanna. I thought it's gonna be a loud dinner with a lot of stories from both Gwen and Johanna. Iyun naman talaga ang normal na mangyayari lalo na kapag matagal silang hindi nagkita.
But it's really silent. And that doesn't surprise me at all.
"Theo, may nakita ka na ba diyan?" tanong ni Emman sa kabilang linya. Nanatiling nakatitig ang mga mata ko sa mga litratong nakuha ko kanina kasama si Gwen.
Kakapasok ko palang sa kwarto, eksakto namang tumawag si Emman. He's already asking me about the model. Paano ba naman? Next week na ang shoot.
"Ikaw? Wala ka na bang ibang model?" I asked, still looking at the photos.
"Ugh, wala na nga. Napakamapili mo kasing gago ka," sagot nito na ikinatawa ko kaagad. That made me earned a curse from him. "Don't laugh at me. Kasalanan mo pa naman kung bakit ako naghihirap ngayon."
Tumigil ako sa pagtawa. "Hey, don't blame me. Talagang ayaw ko lang sa mga model na ipinapakita mo," usal ko rito.
Napabuntong-hininga lang siya. I'm sure that's the only thing he can do right now. Wala siyang magagawa kung ayaw ko.
"Eh, ikaw? May nahanap ka ba?" tanong niya ulit saakin.
This time, my camera's screen stopped in a specific picture, like it was meant to happen. Napatigil ako sa pagpindot ng 'next' button at napatitig rito.
"Kakarating mo pa naman diyan kaya baka wala pa. Pero sigurado akong may mahahanap ka. If you do so, sabihan mo ako kaagad para naman mapatawad kita sa pagpapahirap mo saakin," sunod-sunod nitong sabi, ngunit nanatili lang ang tingin ko sa litrato.
It's a picture of someone who's riding a horse, while putting a straw hat in her head to protect herself from the heat of the sun. I just caught this by accident, yet it's beautifully natural considering that she doesn't know I just took this.
She looks genuinely happy, too.
"Actually," I stared intently at Johanna's face, "I already found one, Emman."