Kai's POV
Go steady wasn't included in my vocabulary. Moreover, courting and making special surprises wasn't also my thing. I used to live my life getting anything without even asking for it, not until I met Shei.
Shei is my everything.
At first, I saw her as a challenge for me to conquer but as the time passed by, I saw her as someone I can't live without. Unknowingly, she taught me to do things I never thought I can do. But I never regret those things because she's worthy of my efforts.
The day she said 'yes', being happy is an understatement. She's my coffee-addict girl and she became my living caffeine.
We're more than two years and almost turning three years when it all started. When she started to changed making me think sometimes that she's not the girl I used to love. Her jealousy and possessiveness worsen. I confronted her and was thinking to take a break for some time but seeing her lying on the hospital bed makes me weak.
When her father died I met her sister named Sheen. Both of them looked very the same in any angle. I can't deny the fact that my heart skipped a beat when I saw her, but admiring the sister of my beloved is the least thing I would do.
After Shei's father internment, Dad told me to visit our business in Pangasinan. Unexpectedly, I met her again, I met Sheen. She told me things that messed my whole system that night but then she just left with no words.
I was driving when my phone beeped. My brother just sent a message.
"I'm here."
In no time, I arrived on the location that he told me. My eyebrows furrowed when I had a clearer view on the place. It looks like an old warehouse with vanished paint.
Hesitation was visible in my every step. This place were just different on the course of business he just told me before.
Silently, I opened the door and saw stuffed toys in every corner. I didn't know that he has stuffed toys factory.
I was occupied looking on the teddy bears when I heard voices upstairs. The thought of my brother having a meeting with important person makes me quietly walked upstair, so that I can't disturb them.
"And so? Ikaw rin naman ah? Pumatay ka rin."
That voice. I know that voice. But why are they talking about killing?
I heard conversations, or better to say, arguments when I get nearer on the last step. Her figure became more recognizable when I finally stood up on the floor.
My brother already saw me but still continue talking with her. Hearing their topic makes me want to walk towards them and interfere but my body stood still. There's something on me telling that I should stay from where I was standing.
My mind filled with questions especially when Kuya addressed her "Sheen" and not 'Shei'.
"Ano ba ang gusto mong palabasin? Akala ko ba sasabihin mo lang sa akin ang plano para mawala na sa landas namin ni Kai si Shei?"
Plano? Anong plano? Naguguluhan na ako sa nangyayari. Kilala ko ang ayos ni Shei at sigurado akong hindi ang ipinakilala sa aking Sheen ang nakaupo doon.
"Sorry to say but there's no plan, Sheen. The plan you're saying is not existing," sambit ni Kuya.
"What do you mean?"
"I can't help the person who is trying to steal the happiness of the person I love. I can't also help the person who killed a friend of my brother."
Pumatay sa kaibigan ko? I can't think of any friend of mine died except for Bruce. But why is my brother trying to tell that the girl sitting on that chair was the person who killed my friend?
"S-sino ba ang kapatid? W-wala akong pinatay?" Looking at her state, she looks crazy while tweaking her hair.
"Bruce McKenzie, remember him?" Question about my friend's identity vanished because of the name he mentioned. "The guy you stab the back nine times until he died? You killed Kai's friend, Sheen."
That girl killed Bruce? Ang babaeng nakaupo doon ay si Sheen? Pero nasaan si Shei? No, I knew to myself that the girl sitting in front of my brother is the same person I spent the day yesterday. But why did Kuya keeps on calling her Sheen and she's not denying it?
At last, I started to gain my strength to walk and asked some questions I want to know the answers. I need to know the truth.
"Y-you killed him? S-sheen?"
Without waiting for response, I quickly grabbed the girl's arm. As of now, I don't know how to address her anymore.
"K-Kai..." Nanlalaki ang mga mata niya ba habang nakatingin sa akin. "Please, let me explain."
"Explain what?"
"H-hindi totoo yung kung ano mang narinig mo. He's just a big liar, making nonsense stories. Umuwi na tayo Kai," I swayed my arm when she tried to hold it.
I just can't let her touch me. Not until I know and make sure that she's Shei and not Sheen as what my brother called her.
"Who are you?"
Her tears started to fell down her cheeks. Para akong biglang nanghina. Ang makita ang mukha ng babaeng mahal ko na mababahiran ng luha ay sadyang nakakapanghina, pero hindi dapat ako magpadala roon.
"I'm She—"
"I said, who are you?" I shouted.
"Her real name is Sheen, Shei's sister, twin rather." Bumaling ang paningin ko kay Kuya at napakunot ang noo.
"Kilala mo siya kuya?" tanong ko na sinagot niya ng isang pagtango. "Then where's Shei?"
Kung hindi ang babaeng hawak ko ngayon si Shei, nasaan siya? Kung hindi siya ang babaeng ito, bakit hindi siya sa akin nagpapakita? Bakit ang babaeng ito ang kinikilala kong Shei?
I saw Kuya looking at my back and there, I saw Sheen. My heart made a weird beat inside my chest. No, this girl right beside me is Sheen then she is...
"S-shei...?" I asked her but she didn't answer back and didn't even shook or nod her head to confirm or deny my question. All she did is to silently cry.
Now, I saw the same faces with same wet eyes and cheeks. But my heart really knows its owner.
I averted my gaze to the girl at my side when she suddenly laughed. There's no trace of tears on her cheeks anymore but her eyes are still swelling.
"Ano 'to, reunion? Masaya kayo? Iiwan niyo na naman ako? Mag-iisa na naman ako? Bibilang na naman ako ng ilang taon bago maging masaya?"
That confirmed a question in my head. Kuya is right, she's Sheen.
"Ikaw!" She pointed Shei, I clearly knew now that she is Shei. "Ikaw ang laging bida! Lahat nalang ng pabor, kaginhawahan, kasayahan, lahat nalang nasa iyo! Habang nagpapakasasa ka sa kayamanan ni mommy, naghihirap ako para mag makain ako. Habang kung ano-anong make up ang hawak mo, tinuturuan akong humawak ng mga baril at patalim para mabuhay! Wala naman akong balak na kuhanin ang yaman na tinatamasa mo. Si Kai lang ang hinihiling ko."
I automatically looked at Shei who then looked at me also.
"Please, iba nalang..." her answer somehow made me in peace.
"Just let them, Sheen."
"A traitor is talking. Nabulag ka na rin ba ng babaeng ito? Kilala mo ako Claw, ang akin ay akin!"
Magkakilala nga sila. Back when they're father died and when I first saw Kuya, there something on their looks. But I tried to take it away from my mind especially when I knew that he's my brother.
"Hindi ako sa 'yo!" sigaw ko. If there's someone who owns me, then that's Shei.
But shouting is not enough to terrify her and I think was a wrong move when she suddenly get something inside her bag. I also have that thing and I know to myself that the thing she's holding is not a toy. It's a real gun.
"At kanino ka, kay Shei? Sa tingin mo papayag akong mapunta ka sa kaniya sa kabila ng mga pinagdaanan ko? Siya pa rin ba ang pipiliin mo kahit alam mo na ngayon at malinaw na sa iyong iniwan ka niya?"
I didn't dare to speak. Yes, I know that she left me because if not, then this won't happen. But I still wanna hear her side. I know that Shei can't left me without a reason.
"Sheen, haya—" sinubukang magsalita ni Kuya pero bigla nalang siyang nanghina at bumagsak sa sahig bago pa man niya matapos ang sinasabi. Tanging pagtawag nalang namin sa pangalan niya at pagdalo sa kaniya ang nagawa namin.
"One down!" Lumingon kami kay Sheen. "Akala mo ba Claw ganoon mo lang ako maiisahan? Masyado kang kampante na wala akong magiging laban. What a shame. Ikaw pa naman ang nagturo sa akin maglagay ng gamot sa inumin. Happy viewing nalang, Claw."
She just confessed what she did. She's the reason behind what happened to Kuya.
"Kayong dalawa, tayo!" utos niya na agad naming sinunod. "Nakakasakit naman kayo. Maghiwalay kayo!"
Sheen holding a gun that makes us follow her demands. We can't disobey her, we don't know if she's going to move the trigger while pointing on us or not. Now that we know that she already killed someone, my friend, we just can't take the risk.
"May isang bala lang rito at hindi ako papayag na hindi ito magagamit." She laughed before pointing the gun alternately on each of us.
"Miney, miney miney, mo. Sino ang babarilin ko?" She sang that makes me shiver.
She laughed again. "Masyado naman kayong takot na takot. 'Wag kayong mag-alala, I'm still considerate. I will give the decision to my beloved, Kai."
"Ano bang gusto mo?"
"Ikaw Kai! Ikaw ang gusto ko, hindi pa ba malinaw iyon? All this time, I was never felt true care and love not until you came into my life. Kaya Kai, Gori... ako nalang."
Umiling ako. "Hindi ikaw si Shei."
"Shei, tama... Shei na naman. Mahal mo pa rin ba talaga siya? Bakit, hindi mo ba minahal iyong Shei na huli mong nakilala?"
I didn't answer her question. I knew to myself that she has occupied a big space in my heart.
"Papipiliin kita." That makes me stare on her. "Ako o si Shei? May isang bala lang rito. If you choose to live with me, I will think if I will spare her life. Pero kung siya ang pipiliin mo..." Tumingin muna siya kay Shei bago muling tumingin sa akin. "hindi ako papayag na mapunta ka sa kaniya. Mas mabuti pang walang makakuha sa iyo isa man sa aming dalawa."
Nagpapalit-palit ang tingin ko sa kanilang dalawa. The day I love Shei, I pledge to myself that I am willing to give her my life. But now, am I willing to die not knowing the answers to my questions?
"Please choose your life, Kai." Lumingon ako kay Shei. Her tears are continuously flowing from her eyes.
Her words helps me to make my decision. I don't want to see her crying in front of me anymore, so it would be better if I end this.
"Right, I'll choose my life."
Sheen slowly point the gun to Shei. "Great choice."
Shei was only three steps away from me. I saw that Sheen was about to click the trigger. She got it wrong.
I ran as fast as I could when she pulled the trigger. A loud banging sound from the gun covered the area that was followed by scream.
In no time, I was able to stand in between them, silently praying that I wasn't late enough. While looking at Shei, the real Shei, I felt a stinging pain inside my chest.
Sinuri ko ang kabuuan niya at napangiti nang wala akong makitang bahid ng anumang dugo sa damit niya. She's still standing alive.
Unti-unting nanghina ang tuhod ko dahilan para mapaluhod ako at mapakapit sa dibdib ko. Napuno ng dugo ang kamay kong pinanghawak doon. Bahagyang nanlabo ang paningin ko at tuluyan na sanang babagsak sa sahig nang makaramdam ako ng mga brasong pumulupot sa katawan ko.
"Kai, no, it's just a nightmare." She closed her eyes but it only makes her tears flew on her cheeks. Pinilit kong abutin ang mukha niya para punasan ang mga luhang iyon.
She then opened her eyes. "No, Kai. Bakit...bakit mo sinalo yung bala? I thought you'll choose your life?"
"S-simply because you're m-my life." I smiled even though I'm in real pain. If I would be given uncountable choices, I would always choose her.
"Kai..." Narinig kong pabulong na salita mula sa gilid ko. Sheen was still standing on her place.
She also fell on her knees while clutching her hair. "W-wala akong kasalanan. Walang kasalanan si Sheen! Wala! Tama, si Shei ang dapat n-nabaril, hindi si—"
"Tumigil ka na Sheen!" I hold Shei's hand making her eyes averted to me.
"I-I love you, Gori ko."
"I love you too," mabilis niyang sagot bago halikan ang labi ko.
Nalasahan ko na ang dugo sa loob ng bibig ko na di rin nagtagal ay umagos palabas. I know, I'm in near death.
"Shei, p-please promise me... you'll be h-happy."
"I'll be happy, we'll be happy, Kai. Just hold on, t-tatawag akong ambulansya." Kinuha niya ang cellphone sa bulsa niya pero bago pa man niya iyon mapindot ay hinawakan ko muli ang kamay niya.
Umiling ako. "No, Shei. I-i want you t-to be happy even w-without me."
"Kai, 'wag kang magsalita ng ganyan. Remember our plan? I am now the Avia Queen. Hindi ba sabi ko sa 'yo papakasalan na kita?"
Akala ko masakit na ang matamaan ng bala at tanggapin sa sarili mong mawawala ka na. Pero mas masakit pa rin palang makitang umiiyak ang mahal mo.
"S-sorry, Shei—"
"No, don't be sorry. Ako dapat ang magsorry. Hindi dapat mangyayari ito kung pinili kong hindi umalis at iwan ka."
Unti-unti nang bumibigay ang mga mata ko. Hindi ko na kaya...
"Kai, hindi. Gori, gumising ka."
The last tear formed in my eyes finally fell down, enveloping the unspoken words that I know to myself, I can't tell Shei anymore.
Thank you for everything Shei. Thank you for giving me the reason to live my life significantly. You're my life and I won't regret that I gave my life.
Sorry for not listening to my heart. Hindi kita agad nakilala nang bumalik ka. I should listen to my heart when it beat inside my chest in unexplainably. I should be the first one to recognize your identity but then I still chose to took away the thought from my mind.
Shei, I will always love you even until my last breath and even in the next life. You'll be always my caffeine and Gori.
I love you, Shei, Gori ko.