It was 7pm, Nur and Humairah had set the table ready for dinner and they rushed to offer their Maghrib prayer which they usually offered In congregation, with their Umma leading.
"Nur we will continue after dinner right?"
Humairah asked, trying her best to hide her anxiety.
"Mairah, I'll continue when I'm ready." Nur snapped getting irritated at her sister's curiosity. It was as if she didn't understand that it isn't exactly a happy story to tell, she was risking all the respect Humairah had for her as her perfect older sister and anytime the thought crossed her mind that Humairah might never look up to her again, she couldn't help but wonder if she made the right decision.
"Yes Nur, take your time, I know it's hard to recall all those painful memories and I'm so glad that you are willing to do it for me. I want you to always remember something Nur, no matter what you tell me about your past, it won't change your image for me, it won't change anything at all, you will always be my ideal." Humairah promised holding Nur's hands, her eyes expressing the love she couldn't put in words for her older sister. That did it for Nur, all the emotions she had bottled up for years came crashing on her, tears kept streaming down her face as she had lost all the control she had, she hugged her sister and freely cried on her shoulders.
" Nur, Humairah, what are you still doing? we are already late for prayer." Mrs Fatima's voice interrupted them.
"Umma, sorry we are on our way." Nur answered as she let go of Humairah and started performing ablution, Humairah too joined in and together they went to their already pissed off Mother.
"Sorry." They mumbled to their mother who just ignored them and started her Iqamah.
  After they concluded their prayers, Their father came back home and they ate their dinner together, they then prayed Isha, the last prayer of the day, then their parents retired to bed leaving Nur and Humairah in the sitting room.
"Let's go and do the dishes, then I'll continue." Nur told Humairah.
"Ok, don't worry I'll do the dishes just sit and watch me." Humairah said smiling, this was her own little way of cheering her sister. She just realized she had been way too irresponsible, always making her do the chores, this was her way of telling her she is willing to share the responsibilities.
"Wow, if I knew this was how I could get you to be responsible, I would have done it sooner." Nur teased.
Humairah just smiled and said
"Let's go."
  "That day is the wildest day of my life, we drove all around Zaria, we ate, drank, played, took pictures and anything you could possibly think of, by 10pm we were totally exhausted. I told him to drive me back to school and he agreed but something was different about him, his countenance had changed. I noticed but chose to let it go thinking he was just tired. When we arrived, I bade him goodbye and made for my hostel when he ran up to me.
" Jaan, don't go" he said, holding my hand.
"Amar, what do you mean?
"We are both exhausted, we need to rest." I replied, a bit confused as to what he meant.
"Jaan, look its been a long time since we saw each other and we won't see each other again anytime soon. Please Jaan, I just want us to spend the whole day together, to be with each other." He said, his voice cracking as if he was on the verge of crying.
"Amar,  if I get what you are saying right, you want me to come to your hotel with you?" I asked a bit alarmed at his request
He just shook his head in affirmation.
"But you know that's not right, we are not allowed to do that yet, I mean we are not married and you know its haram" I said louder than I had expected.
"We are not going to do anything you don't want, don't you trust me Jaan? I'm just requesting this because I want to spend more time with you, is that too much to ask?" He inquired his voice low.
"You know what, I'm sorry I'm being unreasonable, I should just go" He finished, shaking his head, he briskly turned to loeave his shoulders sagging behind him.
It hurt to see him in that state, the usually confident Amar looked hopeless and so miserable and I made him like that. I couldn't see him in that state so I called him back and agreed to go with him on the condition that we won't do anything wrong. You needed to see his face, the happiness and joy written all over his features as he agreed to everything I said, we reached ABU hotel where he had lodged and we went to his room, we talked, ate, played,  one thing lead to another and...... I lost my virginity that night." Nur paused a little to look at her sister, Humairah's expression was unreadable as she had masked whatever she felt really well, she just moved towards Nur and held her shoulder.
"Do You know the scary part of it all was I didn't regret it, yes I felt ashamed and dirty but I didn't regret it, maybe because immediately I woke up and looked shocked at my state and a shirtless Amar bringing tea for me, Amar pacified me, he promised to marry me, he even called his mother there and then and she said it was up to me, they are always ready.  I felt I didn't lose my virginity to a random guy, he's my husband maybe not yet but he's surely going to be, who doesn't get caught up in the moment?we were still going to do this, the difference is we just did ours a bit early, those were the words I comforted myself with". Nur said, now disgust evident in her voice, she felt all the emotions she felt then and the ones she didn't, the ones she had adamantly ignored, regret, shame disgust,she wanted to run and hide.
"He told his mother what you people did and she supported him?" Humairah asked, her eyes wide showing her surprise.
"No, he just told her he wanted to get married to me as soon as  possible."  Nur answered a bit lost, of all she could ask, why did she choose this one? She  replied nonetheless.
At noon, he dropped me back in school and assured me anytime I was ready he was ready, he just needed my agreement in fact if it was up to him we will get married soonest. I just laughed and replied "You have to wait for me to complete my studies."
"Yeah I know."he replied rolling his eyes and pecking my hands.
"Little did I know that I would also want this wedding as soon as possible."